Yeah, but you're an amateur fry cook and I come from a long line of fry cooks that don't live past 25.

Buffy ,'Showtime'


Coffee On My Monitor  

This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.


amych - Jun 02, 2004 6:10:50 am PDT #6234 of 10000
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?

The Divine JZ(hem), on literature:

I have no idea whether mysteries still qualify as genre, but this was back in the late 80s at an East Coast college whose English dept. faculty revered the short, spare, dry as a dry martini left undrunk on the small side table of a New England home inhabited by characters in Carver stories, left there after a perfunctory but necessary cocktail party attended by weary prep-school faculty members who occasionally moonlighted as characters in Cheever novels and discovered weeks later by yet another prep-school faculty member who was housesitting for the homeowner, who spent many hours of his housesitting time regarding the now-empty glass with its now only faintly visible rime of evaporated gin and pondering the growing awareness that he had not been invited to this faculty cocktail party, then going into his colleague's bedroom bathed in the bleached-out comfortless light of a New England winter afternoon, opening his dresser drawers, and contemplating his wife's underwear for hours, short story.

That kind of story.


Topic!Cindy - Jun 02, 2004 6:12:27 am PDT #6235 of 10000
What is even happening?

*shakes tiny, impotent fist at amych*

Curses. Foiled again.


Lilty Cash - Jun 02, 2004 7:14:51 am PDT #6236 of 10000
"You see? THAT's what they want. Love, and a bit with a dog."

Allyson, in Minearverse

ita's mom pays us two chickens a week to be "friends" with her daughter, and yes, contradicting bon bon is in the contract


DCJensen - Jun 02, 2004 3:03:26 pm PDT #6237 of 10000
All is well that ends in pizza.

Teppy (Steph L) in Bitches:

I have always LOVED my doctor because he doesn't seem to think a person will die if her weight doesn't fit into column on a chart.

Plus, he's funny. When he told me he wanted me on meds, I told him that I really wanted to get my first heart attack in before age 35, and I felt that medication would really hinder me in reaching that goal. He didn't even bat an eye; he just said "You should start smoking, then."


Pix - Jun 02, 2004 7:36:39 pm PDT #6238 of 10000
The status is NOT quo.

ita in Bureaucracy expresses beautifully how we all feel now and then when the hivemind leaves us in the dust:

Are you about ready to explain it to those of us less ... well, I have no idea less what, since I have no idea what the hell you're on about? Or do you need some more time to ... WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?


Trudy Booth - Jun 03, 2004 6:26:28 am PDT #6239 of 10000
Greece's financial crisis threatens to take down all of Western civilization - a civilization they themselves founded. A rather tragic irony - which is something they also invented. - Jon Stewart

Nutty: George Tenet was like the ultimate political battered wife. He kept being like, Yeah, that was my fault, I do everything wrong, he's always right, I provoked him. Hopefully Tenet is now in a shelter somewhere, learning how to assert his right not to be blamed.

... and also writing a tell-all book. Tell-all books are key to the recovery process.


Toddson - Jun 03, 2004 6:34:33 am PDT #6240 of 10000
Friends don't let friends read "Atlas Shrugged"

ita, in Natter:

My plant relationships seem to involve regular trips to the brink of death. You have no idea how excited I am by the prospect of extending that to homo sapiens.


deborah grabien - Jun 03, 2004 2:13:43 pm PDT #6241 of 10000
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

Deena in Great Write, explaining a presently popular childrens' television character to the kidTV-challenged:

Mash a teletubby. Add LSD. Sprinkle with weird theremin like sound and glitter. Swirl in the air and provide cut out people figures to watch. That's a boobah.


smonster - Jun 03, 2004 5:34:52 pm PDT #6242 of 10000
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.

In Minearverse:

Allyson: If you paid me 14 bucks and a pack of Marlboro's to do so, I'd tear your nose off with a plier and replace it with Silly Putty.


billytea - Jun 04, 2004 6:28:05 am PDT #6243 of 10000
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

Toddson, in F2F:

I was talking to some friends and we decided that cicadas are the teenagers of the insect world - they're awkward, noisy, and think of nothing but sex. After all - they ARE 17!