Madrigal Costello discussing LTRs in Natter 11:

[S]o far, close up attempts aren't working. The current obsession still appears clueless - right now the next step would be serenading him with Liz Phair songs in his office in a bikini and hip boots playing a lute, but he'd probably just think I was trying to get him to join a band.

Natter X:

flea: I just ate a chocolate chocolate chip muffin. AIFG.

Theodosia: Chocolate chips shouldn't really go into muffins. It's like mixing up the wrong food groups or something.

Cindy: This is truer than anything in the world. I love chocolate chips. I love muffins. They should never meet, because they do not become a taste sensation. Really, they're an abomination unto the loward. I read it in Leviticus.

Beth b: Timelies. While I prefer blueberry muffins - chocolate chip would do - I am hungry.

Madrigal: Huh. I just realized that it's been years since I've had an actual muffin - not since high school home ec. It's an odd feeling.

DX: However, I will stand in solidarity with flea in the chocolate chip muffin corner. Especially if there are some chocolate chocolate chip muffins there. Or blueberry. It's all good.

Nutty: Chocolate chip muffins suffere the burden of having to be hot, or else the chips re-harden and then you are eating a muffin with little chocolatey rocks in it. Which is no good. I'm not against them in principle, but in practice I don't find my needs being met!

shrift: If there are blueberry muffins, I'm there. And Rio can mock us in ASSCAPS for being whitey.

erikaj: I hate blueberry stuff. I just do. But it's not like a squick. Other people can eat blueberries in front of me.

brenda m: Blueberry muffins bore me. A place near my old office had wonderful cranberry muffins. But really, leaving aside bran or corn muffins, muffins are really just an excuse to eat cake for breakfast without admitting what you're doing.

Kind of like asking for an extra-extra dry martini because you don't have the guts to just ask for a big ol' glass of gin.

continued,

DX:

Hands shrift a blueberry muffin, snuggles in between her and flea.

Cake is good for you! Eggs, milk, wheat, nutrition!

Oh well. More for us then.

Gus: Being sworn off carbs, the natter about blueberry muffins (as close to manna as mankind has come) is making me weep. Also, with the pizza-weeping. Yes. I am weeping pizza. It's ugly. Sorry for the visual.

Sean: Still just brimming over with the shrift love. Even more so after...

i And holy jeebus, am I glad I rebuilt my box this morning at work.
That sounds porny. But it isn't, I swear...

shrift: Aww. It's like we're forming the Militant Blueberry Muffin Separatists Party here in the corner, complete with cryptic computer geek pseudo-porn.

Jesse in Natter:

All the -ma a person could need! Right here on this very thread!! COME'N'GETIT!!

Wolfram, in Buffy:

Deena, when I get tossed in the boiling cauldron of hell, guess who I'm using for a raft?

In UnAmerican:

Leigh: I'm sooo not helping my not-crazy case, am I? I've got the flu! I'm on medication! I don't know what I'm saying typing!
Julie: I think the phrase you're looking for is "Look, Over there! An eight hundred pound elephant wearing pink gingham and juggling SMGs!"

Catching up, all from Bitches:

PMM:

I should really do a mat class, but I hate to leave the house. I'm telling you, if I were a billionaire? I'd be totally reclusive and just pay people to come and entertain me.

billytea:

Hey Ple, there's a new invention that brings the 'distraction-hungry recluse' lifestyle within the reach of the average Jo. It's called television.

PMM:

But I want people to bring me wine and peeled grapes and to juggle.

What does it say about our society that we've made home-delivered entertainment widely affordable, yet the home-delivered peeled grape market remains exclusively the province of the rich? And where's my flying car, for that matter?

(BTW, what does it say about the rich that peeled grapes are such a hit with them? I mean, is it a normal reaction to a grape to be saying "This could be slimier"?)

Peeled, it's like eating the eyeballs of your enemies.

billytea:

IME, they're surprisingly different. Eyeballs are much tougher and chewier. (PS: would culinary skill at cooking eyeballs be termed a sense of humor?) Now, a peeled mucous-filled squash ball, that might give you a similar experience.

ita:

Yes! Plus the aqueous humour is squirtier, and then there's the crunch of the lens.

This is why Nigella Lawson always stresses that you have to remove the contacts before serving.

~~~

connie:

This thread is better than the soaps any day.

~~~

billytea:

BTW, speaking of my DW; I'm in the middle of some relatively ferocious study right now. I've done up a summary list of all the topics I need to cover, and I've been scribbling notes about how they stand - exam-ready, need more work, barely coping, that sort of thing. So I get home today to discover that Bec's found it, and added her own commentary. I now have notes like these:

FUNDAMENTALS OF MULTINATIONAL FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT
Me: Still not comfortable.
Bec: Yes, but it looks real sexy on you!

~~~

amyth:

I'm thinking of making up a care package for my nephew, but I'm lost as to what to put into it. Barring porn, what do 17 yo boys want to get in care packages?

smonster:

Linoleum.

FYI, the Unknown Bitch is me.

So edited. Thanks.

Cindy, on her debt to Scott Baio:

It was an autograph thing. I was completely crushed by much larger/older teenaged girls waiting in the line. When it was finally my turn, Scott had apparently run out of time and was supposed to leave. They said he had to stop signing and just shake hands to move the line along. I was crushed. He must have seen that. He said, "Can't I give her a kiss?" The handler said he couldn't because then everyone would want one. He gave me one anyhow. I floated all the way home.

That's why, no matter how much of a parody of himself he ever becomes, I'll always have a soft spot for Chachi.