shrift:

Anyone who doesn't agree with me isn't automatically bad and wrong.

I mean, I once had a brief flash of "Damn, Paul Stanley's lookin' mighty hot!" at a KISS concert once, and it still haunts me.

Billytea in Dude Where's my Precious (the first is a quote from an off site author about Tolkien and sex)

Although Tolkien never said that the elves DID have hot gay sex, he also never said that they DIDN’T.

Really, you'd be amazed at the sheer volume of hot gay sex Tolkien neglected to rule out in his writing. For instance, he could have written "'Alas!' said Aragorn. 'Thus passes the heir of Denethor, Lord of the Tower of the Guard! And yet had we delayed to seize our opportunity for hot gay sex! This is a bitter end." Or he could have had Sam saying "I've got a bit of a stew for you, and some broth, Mr Frodo. Do you good. Not as much good as a bracing morning of hot gay sex, I'll warrant, but there's little to be done about that, with that Gollum sneaking about at all hours. Well, you'll have to sup it in your mug; or straight from the pan, when it's cooled a bit. It'll have to do for now." But did he? No, he didn't.

Really, if he's going to be so ambiguous is it any surprise that people wonder?

Allyson, in Firefly:

I can't tell you how proud I am to live in a country where our founding fathers had the foresight to imagine that California's DMV would fucking blow so much that Massachusetts would have to prosecute them for stealing license plates.

This is EXACTLY why we can't let the terrorists win.

billytea in Natter:

For me Christmas means 90-degree weather, late sunsets, and my younger brother explaining that in his job assessing worker's comp claims for the defence forces, he grants automatic approval if they've lost a testicle. Doesn't care how they did it, you lose a goolie, you get the dosh.

Angus, being cool in Natter:

Because I would hate for anyone to just explode or something through an inability to assimilate my level of coolness.

PMM contemplating the holidays:

I'm at my parents' place. We arrived early. Thank goodness they have broadband.

In Firefly:

Kiba Rika

...anyone sacrificing goats to me?

Didn't think so.

I prefer mints anyway. They smell MUCH nicer.

ita

I'm open to sacrificial goats. Anoint them with curry powder and some cream of coconut, and rack them up. Ta, ever so.

ita, contemplating The Two Towers: Will Aragorn tenderly clasp every corpse?

Shawn: L: "You're late."
A: "I"ve been hugging every corpse from Edoras to Helms Deep, so step off, all right?"

Victor: L: (to self) Still the prettiest. YEEEEES!

Kristen in Firefly (not spoilery):

Dear Santa:

With a little over an hour left before your arrival, I would like to submit my belated Christmas list. I know it's late but, hey, I've been busy. I'm sure that you have an elf monitoring this board and he can hit you up on the two-way with my requests.

I have been a rather good girl this year...no, really. I mean it. Stop laughing, you oafish freak. I've been damned freaking nice and haven't bitch slapped 90% of the people that I wanted to this year. Okay, granted, if I had bitch slapped everyone I wanted to, my arm would be in traction but, hey, the point remains. I have been good. So, you know, you should give me stuff. Here's my list:

1. Dental insurance. I know why. You know why. Let's not dwell.
2. Smite all persons who make stupid remarks, such as, "women really aren't natural leaders."
2b. A camcorder to commemorate the aforementioned smitings.
3. Free iced blended vanillas for the rest of my natural life.
4. Vienna. Don't ask. It's a thing.
5. Firefly on UPN.
5b. 10,000 copies of the press release heralding the aforementioned Firefly on UPN news so that I may stuff a copy down the throats of every person who tried to fuck with me during this campaign. [Yes, I have a list. It will make it easy to track them down for the stuffage.]
5c. That, in celebration of Firefly's new home on UPN, Minear will kill Inara. Hard. Possibly at the hands of some chainsmoking redheaded chick who is not named Wilhemenia.
6. Any member of NSYNC that is not Lance or Joey.

That's it. Not a huge list. But a list. You should get on it.

Don't make me use those unfortunate pictures of you and the Easter Bunny.

Hugs and kisses and extortion,
Kristen

PS You might want to tell Rudolph to switch colors. I think he'd look better in a yellow-based red than the blue-based red he's got going on now.

meara's tagline:

Playing Trivial Pursuit With the Family: Brother:"What is a male witch called?" Mom: "Um....a vegan?"