Affect. Sorry.
t /pedant
I like books. I just don't want to take on too much. Do they have an introduction to the modern blurb?
Buffy ,'Lessons'
Buffista Fic: It Could Be Plot Bunnies
Where the Buffistas let their fanfic creative juices flow. May contain erotica.
smonster - Sep 25, 2003 12:02:05 pm PDT #6832 of 10001
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.
deborah grabien - Sep 25, 2003 12:02:16 pm PDT #6833 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.
Nicole, nope - not predictable. I do think - don't hit me - that you haven't got Angel's voice down quite right; I couldn't wrap his tongue around a few of his lines.
"Does it effect me?"
Affect. "A" for the action, "E" for the result. Verb and noun. Signed, woman who still occasionally transposes those two things herself.
One thing, and one thing only, that I'd change in Cordy's dialogue: from one designer shoe junkie to another, she wouldn't be demanding her Prada shoe. She'd be demanding her Prada. Same if it was Jimmy Choo heels, or Fluevogs, or Doc Martens: she wouldn't specify the shoe. If she's hopping around in one shoe, or she's barefoot, we're shown what she's after, rather than told in her demand to Phantom!Dennis.
Nicole - Sep 25, 2003 12:22:43 pm PDT #6834 of 10001
I'm getting the pig!
I do think - don't hit me - that you haven't got Angel's voice down quite right; I couldn't wrap his tongue around a few of his lines.
No no no! That's exactly what I want to know. And deborah, you were one of the people that I really wanted feedback from so of course I wouldn't hit you. I decided before posting it that if certain people didn't make a comment on the story - because they either couldn't stand it or had nothing nice to say - that I would discontinue the writing thing. A least until I took classes or looked at a dictionary again.
Huge thanks to everyone that did read it and comment on it. I take no offense at criticism. Even smonster with her Affect obsession. *g*
Connie Neil - Sep 25, 2003 12:26:11 pm PDT #6835 of 10001
brillig
I was worried that it had too much dialogue
t blink blink that's possible?
erikaj - Sep 25, 2003 12:27:53 pm PDT #6836 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!
Wrod...was just wondering the same.
Nicole - Sep 25, 2003 12:47:35 pm PDT #6837 of 10001
I'm getting the pig!
Wrod...was just wondering the same.Well, since I haven't read much buffyfic (or others) I wasn't sure how much back story or description about what the characters looked like I should include, therefore making the dialogue stand out to me.
In regards to Angel's dialogue, I had to re-watch parts of Season One Angel to try to get a feel for him (back when he used to smile and laugh more often even when a baby wasn't in the scene) and it didn't work. For some reason I can't hear what I think he would say in my head.
Any suggestions? (Like that's an easy question.)
erikaj - Sep 25, 2003 12:49:08 pm PDT #6838 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!
Hmmm, I don't have a good handle on him, either. Watch a lot of episodes. Does he remind you of anyone? Go with it if he does.
Nicole - Sep 25, 2003 12:56:23 pm PDT #6839 of 10001
I'm getting the pig!
I think the other characters sound pretty strong - especially since I didn't give Anya much to say. It must just be a thing with Exceptionally Old and Been on the Earth Longer Than Anyone I've Ever Met characters.
erikaj - Sep 25, 2003 12:59:04 pm PDT #6840 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!
Uh huh...that is a problem. My Spike voice is only good for a sentence and a half at a time. Very sad.
Connie Neil - Sep 25, 2003 1:00:59 pm PDT #6841 of 10001
brillig
My Spike voice is only good for a sentence and a half at a time
Then you make him do something else with his mouth.