SA, I'd say let them rant but blow them off. Their concerns are parental concerns and yeah, at least they're worried about you.

But you're in the middle of a great experience. How many other people are taking the challenge of travelling and working in another country while they're young and before they have settled down with a career and all the baggage? Not very many. You're having an adventure that is priceless. And if that means deferring student loan payments for a while or paying a little extra credit card interest, I say fucking go for it. Your parents will always worry and may always bitch about it but keep their interferring to a minimum and keep it in perspective. They bitch because they love and worry about you. You're still the one making the decisions and dealing with the issues in the end, which you should be proud of.

SA, what Cashmere said. It will be soon enough once you get back Stateside to taking care of business.

IOmeN, I have not been very responsible with my money and I'm pretty grown-up. I called today to get rid of my expanded cable. It will save me $43 a month. Go me. All because I can't keep my credit cards in my pocket, sigh. At least with basic cable I'll still get TLC and that kind of stuff. I was afraid I'd lose the SciFi channel, but it's part of basic! Yay!

Actually, you aren't being irresponsible, you are makeing choices. and you are willing to do what you have to do ( make the call to the loan people) so that things are done right. give yourself a ceiling for the credit card debtand don't worry about it too much. It sounds to me like you are doing the right thing in other wasy - like thinking of cheap food that you can eat for three days. Mom's ranting, parental concern. she is going to see everything now, so she knows more than she should. But you are just out of college, so parents tend to stay invovled longer than they should

But , you might want to consider on line bill paying. because a lot of bills can be sent to you electronicly. You hae to pay some attention, but I find it is also a decent way to budget

But , you might want to consider on line bill paying. because a lot of bills can be sent to you electronicly. You hae to pay some attention, but I find it is also a decent way to budget

This. I pay all my bills online, now. Nearly all of them will send e-mail reminders of when they are due. I put a follow-up flag on them for 5 days before the bill is due. I make many fewer late payments this way.

on a good day - the bill arrives and I put it in the queue to be paid on the day it is due. on a bad day - I remeber two days before - and it still goes out on time. On a really bad day - I pay it late, but it is paid the day after I remember it.

Good luck DJ and brenda! May the work force be with you!

Even after she graduated, got a job and was paying all her own bills, her mother would find her checkbook in her purse when she was home visiting, go through it and start lecturing her on her finances. My friend finally put her foot down and figured out a way to keep her mother out of her finances but it wasn't easy.

Straitjacket? Superglued her fingers? Asp in the purse?

you might want to consider on line bill paying

beth is wise. This has so thoroughly saved my ass and what remains of my credit rating over the past four years. GODSEND.

Also, I'm sending loads of back-waaaay-off-ma to your parents, because that's just a whole load of stress that you really don't need (also, it sounds like you're totally aware of and clear on the issues already; you truly don't need your parents, however well-meaning and genuinely concerned they are, poking and poking at the sore spots).

JZ, if you are still around, did you happen to receive a package w/o a note, postmark Puerto Rico, recently? I'm def. *not* fishing for a thank you, but I just want to make sure you got it!

It would help if I could figure out a way to get money from here to home without having to go through my parents. I set up online banking here, but it doesn't work for American bills yet, which is a frustration. I think I'm going to have to email my mother back saying back off. Because I seriously can't take this support-of-what-you're-doing one day and you're-ruining-your-financial-future on another. It can't be both ways. Sometimes you have to take risks to do what's right for you.

SA, I had a huge fight with my parents when I went to France for a summer. My best friend had offered to take care of my bills when I was gone, I said thanks, and thought nothign more about it. My parents found out about it and flipped out, going on and on about privacy, and trust, etc. I said "this is the woman that you call your second daughter, what is your problem? This is not your call. I'm sorry that you're upset, I really don't understand why. She offered, I accepted. And I know that she is going to do what I ask without comment or criticism." (with the implication that they would not) They were pissed, but got over it.

(the point of the story is the last bit. )