horray for hil!

the ick is leaving me

germ-free hugs for everyone

I pwn you, Brother William. This time.

Brother William is totally your bitch.

I saw a baby skunk a few months ago around the corner from our apartment. It was nosing along the door to the alleyway next to somebody's garage, surrounded (at a respectful distance) by a crowd of cooing humans completely in the thrall of its teeny tiny cutefulness. Everyone guessed that its family was probably in the backyard at the end of the alleyway and somehow it'd gotten separated, but none of us actually lived in the house so we couldn't open the door and reunite it with its smelly but adorable loved ones. OMG so fricking cute.

In other ridiculous cute news, People just posted the first-ever picture of the Brangelina baby on their website, and it's utterly fucking ridiculous.

I've seen many, many babies less than two weeks of age. They're beautiful in that tiny-helpless-mammal way, but they're not cute. They're usually kind of red, or red-and-white splotchy, their skin doesn't quite fit yet, and they're still flummoxed by the cold dry bright world they've been spat out into, and they crane their necks and blink and look affronted and jerk their heads like snapping turtles. They're conceptually heartbreakingly beautiful, but they're not objectively pretty. They're just not.

But this tiny baby? Fucking ridiculous placid peaches-and-cream beautifully proportioned symmetrical cherubic Botticelli beauty. It's a triumph of movie star eugenics. It's an Uncanny Valley newborn baby. It's deeply creepy. I think I have to go stare at it again.

It's a triumph of movie star eugenics.

Or Photoshop...

I definitely pondered Photoshop, while goggling in a hopelessly enthralled manner. There was probably some color correction on the newborn-blotchy skin, but unless someone managed to Photoshop the entire damn baby all I can say is, this baby is totally UNFAIR.

unless someone managed to Photoshop the entire damn baby

my baby iz pastede on yay!

Alien baby?

They're usually kind of red, or red-and-white splotchy, their skin doesn't quite fit yet, and they're still flummoxed by the cold dry bright world they've been spat out into, and they crane their necks and blink and look affronted and jerk their heads like snapping turtles. They're conceptually heartbreakingly beautiful, but they're not objectively pretty. They're just not.

Four days: [link]

Maybe a week?: [link]

But this tiny baby? Fucking ridiculous placid peaches-and-cream beautifully proportioned symmetrical cherubic Botticelli beauty.

If you go to Celebrity Baby Blog, you can find a link to scans of all the pictures in the set. There's at least one with the WTF!?! turtle expression.

If you go to Celebrity Baby Blog, you can find a link to scans of all the pictures in the set. There's at least one with the WTF!?! turtle expression.

That's a comfort. Possibly it is human after all.

However, pictures of Lily do not count as refutations of the unearthliness of the Brangelina baby, as I have long thought the gorgeosity of both Lily and her mother very suspiciously unearthly.

vw, one of my sisters once came to visit me with two sets of house keys. The day she left, we found one set in the vegetable bin, and one in my dooryard. I consider this a miracle, since TWICE during that visit she left them on top of the car and drove off. Fortunately, we only had to dodge traffic once to recover them in those instances.

Oh, my!

Now I must head over to find Brangelina baby pictures. I'm just about as obsessed with them as I am with TomKat.

See? [link]

A beautiful baby, but not quite so uncanny!