Sad thing is, sister keeps wanting me to fix up her mess. Of course, somehow I'm supposed to do that without throwing anything away, disturbing anything, or pissing her off.
Oh. my. god. This describes nearly every clutter client I have ever had. It's really sad. They WANT their lives to be different...or at least they want to feel like they are doing what they are supposed to, even if it is in direct conflict with what they 'need' (i.e. clutter). It's really, really hard for them. Which is why, I think, they trust me. I really don't have negative feelings about the habit. Hurting people? Bad. Hurting oneself? Bad. Being mean for the sake of it? Unacceptable. Clutter? Eh. It's a thing.
Actually, Beej, that made me feel better. Seriously.
I'm so glad Steph. Seriously, you ever need stories to help you feel better about this, believe me sistah, I got some stories.
And I wholeheartedly endorse the Dyson Animal model. It's the STUFF. Monstrosuckmo goodness.
I might explain this later, but for the meantime I'm just gonna say...
expedite...
expedite...
expedite...
That word is HYSTERICAL!
I hope it won't scare Fay but my first meal of the day is a Niman Ranch Fearless Frank
Like your breakfast, I am fearless. And frank.
And in no danger of eating a hotdog any time soon.
Thanks Cindy and Spidra!
I'm afraid that our next large purchase is going to be a Dyson. The Hoover Windtunnel is just not cutting it with a dog, 2 cats and my hair in the house.
Or, alternatively, the Siamese would hop on it while it was cleaning, and ride it around like it was her royal carriage.
Damn. Now I feel like I need to get my Roomba a cat.
they will salvage something from the decoy garbage and triumphantly wave it in your face in order to mock you for having discarded something needed.
This is hilarious and ever so true. I've used the old bait and switch on nearly every job. Plus? I put in the contract that I am allowed to remove at least one garbage bag for each session. And I work by myself most of the time. Having the client right there doesn't really help them, and ups both our anxieties. Most people end up asking me to toss stuff without telling them.
But they're gourmet!
Actually, what you should really stay away from is Danish pølser. People make fun of hot dogs for being whatever's leftover, but pølser are that. Plus cardboard and starch, methinks.
A hysterical vw is a cute vw. Or even heartbreakingly adorable.
Or even heartbreakingly adorable.
I think the correct word is "beautiful."
Expedite!
The thing about clutter being harmless to others isn't really true if the housemates are disturbed and inconvenienced. For example, MIL wishes she could use her sewing machine, but she can't because the table is covered with FIL's paperwork that must never be disturbed. Sister's roomie is angry about not having access to most of the house and that she's ashamed to have anybody come over and behold the horror. This is why I think the need to cover every square inch of space with stuff is a territorial dominance thing. If only they could be made happy with the chance to just go pee out in the yard...
