Wanna get with the sluttiest girls your nasty imagination can dream of? We can be whatever you want us to be. After all, it is your fantasy. Do you want us to be spreadeagled on the bed, or taking it on our hands and knees...

And then it asks for your credit card information.

ita,
Calling the numbers so you don't have to, since 2006.

Because I have to, and therefore all must suffer.

Though I kinda like [link] and [link] . I suppose I could go find some slash that would work with those beds. It's all about time management, baby.

Yeeesh, thank you for saving me from that, ita. You deserve a cupcake. Have you made them yet?

The cupcakes should be out of the oven any time now. I wonder how many will be left to frost with ganache.

Dear piece of shit in the grocery store parking lot,

A few times a month, you choose this lot to approach people, claim that your truck broke down, and that you need some change for the bus.

You are creepy, and I hate you. You want to panhandle? Ask for change. Don't make up the same story over and over designed to make people believe that you aren't panhandling.

So when you approached me for the umpteenth time with your, "Excuse me, miss...." And I say, "NO," and you say, "what, you're not a miss?" you are lucky that I don't scream, "GET YOUR HANDS OFFA ME!!!" So that the neighborhood Coffee Bean rats don't hop the fence and beat you to death.

See, because I wouldn't make up some bullshit lie like that to get sympathy.

PS: It's probably not going to be a good panhandling day when the other guy in the lot is washing windows for a donation of cash or canned goods. That guy is always going to win.

ooooh. It felt good to get that rage out.

I prefer there to be slash involved if I am following your lead.

We'll be back to the regularly scheduled slash in about a week. Until then, please excuse my mutterings about duvets and housewares.

I let Buffistas lead me into temptation and what do I get? Housework.

I have put away the winter clothes and filled the dress closet with cotton summery goodness. Have also watched this weeks VM. I love that show. Know what other show I love? GA! and it's new and I am happy.

Allyson, is it possible for you to somehow incite this guy to make a move on you, so you can beat the shit out of him? Or at the very least, kick him in the nuts.

Hey, NY folks? I'm trying to get a cousin of mine married so I can dance at the wedding. So, I'll need from you a straight guy who's looking for a 22 year old doing her Masters in film. She cleans up real well, and just because she looks she can wrestle you to the ground and break your neck doesn't mean she will. She's very mild mannered. She's the girly one.

Please to help.

Ooh, I hate those extended song-and-dance scammers. I had one in my old neighborhood.

I will think if I know anyone interested in marrying a 22 year old.