I am deeply, deeply scarred. My mom and one of my cousins came over for dinner tonight, and in the course of conversation -- and referring to the as-yet-unnicknamed boy -- my mom used the word "fuckbuddy." Gleefully.

Hee. Do you wish you'd gone with 'Teppy's Love Weasel' now?

Just kidding, although I can neither confirm nor deny that I have been practising Barry White readings of "Love Weasel". Still, if you're going to be put into therapy, nice to have this sort of issue to spark it. t starts singing What the world. Needs now. Is therapy. Sweet therapy. It'stheonlything. That there's just. Too little... erapy... Um.

(PS: am I wrong, or is your mother getting a bit ahead of herself here?)

This is California. We don't have anemic school budgets.

They are fashionably anorexic.

Yeah, some schools get nice stuff. In April I'm installing about $90,000 worth of state of the art sound gear into a school near Santa Barbara.

(PS: am I wrong, or is your mother getting a bit ahead of herself here?)

Erm. Not....really.

FUCKBUDDAYYYYYYYYYYYYY

(since I'm not your Mom, that's fine)

If I were your Mom, a stellar response might be, "Two words, Mom, Jerry. Springer."

Erm. Not....really.

Well. In that case, I reckon you've earned a little "and I care what you say why?" time.

Oh! While I think of it, I've ordered the remaining Sandman books (6-10). I figured I'd chuck the odd Batman collection onto the end of it too. I think I've got Long Halloween, Dark Victory, and Dark Knight Returns. Or soemthing like that. And Marvel 1602, which I saw when staying at Anne's in Baltimore.

If I were your Mom, a stellar response might be, "Two words, Mom, Jerry. Springer."

Is there a history with the King of Confrontation you're not telling us about?

If I were your Mom, a stellar response might be, "Two words, Mom, Jerry. Springer."

Is there a history with the King of Confrontation you're not telling us about?

Hey, he has a long and colorful history in my fair city. For real. He was on City Council back in the day ("the day" being the 1970s) and got busted for patronizing a hooker. HOW did he get busted, you ask? He paid with a check.

No, seriously. You can look it up.

So he resigned. And then, a few years later, was re-elected. As mayor. Seriously.

t edit And it JUST now occurred to me what Trudy was referring to -- back in the mid-80s, when my newly divorced mom was partying like a rock star at the discos in town, Jerry Springer was a regular fixture at all the hot spots, and hit on everything with ovaries. Including my mom.

Who did NOT, for the record, hook up with Jerry.

No, seriously. You can look it up.

No, no, I know his history with Cincinnati. I'm curious as to why it's a great comeback if Trudy were your mother.

HEY NOW! Not if I were her Mother, if her Mother said such a thing.

Who did NOT, for the record, hook up with Jerry.

Well, that's what she says. For the sake of abuse (a.k.a. self defense) we don't have to believe that.