My ears are pierced twice, but the second holes, higher up on the ear just never healed right...on two different tries years apart...so they are now closed.
I have a full-blown needle phobia so all my peeps were astonished when I got my ankle tat. I was more than anxious but it turned out to be nothing at all to fret about. The first 5 minutes were stingy but after that I was all bent over watching the process. neat.
In post date news. I've been caught up in a wind that whirls.
It has been a wonderful experience on a number of levels. AND, one of those life lessons that I am sometimes wearied of. Aren't I fully baked in the emotional maturity department yet.
Fella is very, very interesting and so like me in some ways that it is startling yet soo comfortable and familiar.
- Uber geek--check
- wildly over educated (at the same U for one of our degrees each)
- similar food, lifestyle preferences
- similar interests (no surprise since we met at a meetup
- and most astonishing of all, we have made the same choices where faith is concerned
He is a bit fussy, as I suspected. Got a road rage thing I find unattractive, but in general, I've never really felt this comfortable with someone...physicaly or emotionally.
We even dance well together.
We had three dates in three days...the first one I already reported. The second was a lovely restaurant followed by endless talk a a little bit of salvation from my exhile in the nga corner. Yay. The third was a neighborhood party thrown by myself and a friend...he waded into a group of 50 people he didn't know...many of whom were leering to get a glimpse of 'the new guy'...very brave. Made himself quite useful and swept me off my feet on the dance floor. We dance pretty well together...which is rare in my geeky circles.
Then. Then we hit the iceberg that we may or may not get past.
Turns out he was not entirely truthful about a relationship he hasn't quite ended.
I'd have been okay knowing that...not sure if my behavior would have been any different to by frank...but the choice should have been mine. And the other person's.
He's as contrite as possible and I sincerely believe his explanation and his intent to make it right. But I have what some might consider an inflated sense of honor and this is a rough one for me.
We had a poignantly beautiful, thoughtful, caring discussion about it and the end result was basically, to quote the Barenaked Ladies...'get that together and come back and see me."
Not sure if I'll be in the same space, but I'm open to it.
But regardless, I've had a wonderful time and am infinitely grateful for the experience. I feel like my pilot light is relit after much too long a time in the cold and dark.
Beej, glad the dates went well. Sad to hear he was less than forth-coming about something I think a lot of us would consider important. It's definitely one of my stumbling blocks, those things I consider "sins of omission." I hope it all works out well in the end.
Thanks Sail.
The sin ended up being slightly more than omission. I actually met the other person when myself and a friend bumped into Fella at a movie.
Fella made great pains to say that this person was 'just a friend' and that there was nothing going on there. Which was odd since we hadn't even really spoken to each other. I guess this was part of the 'year of uncertaintly' while Fella was deciding when to approach me.
He insists that he's never been in this situation before, he knows he handled it badly and regrets the 'collateral damage' caused by his lack of courage.
Goodness knows, I've hedged more than one bet in my life, so I'm not really angry per se. It's just not acceptable to me.
I guess if it is a new thing - it is not surpriseing he didn't handle it well. I'm thinking if it waws me, it might not be a no, but it would be a slooow waay dooown sign for me. He doesn't know you , he doesn't know what is important to you- but unless the situation with the other one was much more serious than I suspect it was, he might get a chance.
So, I just saw whole bunches of bayarea buffistas with lots of wine and cheese. conclusion: We need to do more eastbay stuff.
Congrats on the dateage, Beej. I don't envy the situation you're in. Honesty and candor are of prime importance to me in a relationship and it sounds like they matter to you, too. I hope it all works out to your satisfaction.
Goodness knows, I've hedged more than one bet in my life, so I'm not really angry per se. It's just not acceptable to me.
Understandable, both the bet hedging and the non-acceptance. I've had a number of friends who thought nothing of having two or three beaux to their string at the same time. I just know it's something I can't do and don't appreciate having done to me.
I've had a number of friends who thought nothing of having two or three beaux to their string at the same time. I just know it's something I can't do and don't appreciate having done to me.
I've known people like that. It's like they need to have a pitcher warming up in the bullpen just in case they need to pull their current pitcher from the game.
Which makes sense, except for the whole part of how dating is not baseball.
What does one wear to a 70's roller skating party?
It's like they need to have a pitcher warming up in the bullpen just in case they need to pull their current pitcher from the game.
That, I don't mind. If the first pitcher really blows it, you pull him and move on with the next one. You just don't go back to that first pitcher.
No, the one's I could never understand were the ones that juggled 2 or 3 people
at the same time.
I tried it once and it was just so screwed up I never did it again. I was always afeared of what happened to Beej happening to me, only with me in the role of the fella. It was just too stressful and I decided I wasn't the type to juggle. One at a time is enough.
