The last year and a half has been one of the hardest periods in my life. I'm not sure when it'll be better. It will probably take at least 'til mid-way through 2006 to start turning around. Had to move twice in one year (moving is always a bitch when you're disabled). Have been living on a construction site for a year and have had my stuff stolen, fucked up, etc. all year long. Little privacy, and I'm quite the homebody. Work sucking like hell. Personal life pretty crappy. Health crappy. After three years of keeping off weight, the stress this year made it climb right back up and I haven't been able to shake it.
I guess this year has been about growth. Lessons. My never-ending battle to try to develop a more positive way of looking at the world instead of the negative one I was raised with. Even though it has been a far more traumatic process than I ever bargained on, I may possibly have a better housing situation come out of this. I may be a homeowner. I've got a roof over my head and a lot of people don't. My working class lifestyle, although I resent it, is far cushier than the lifestyle of the majority of humans on this planet. I'll keep trying to be a better person, I'll keep trying to see the good side of things, I'll keep trying to not just be an okay person, but to get in touch with my joy again and be less narcissistic.
I still have half of my holiday cards to send out.
They will be New Year's cards instead of Christmas cards, I think. Or possibly Epiphany cards.
I just got a box from Alaska - from Gayle!!! But my family is saying I have to wait to open.
Pout.
A Katie-shaped elf dropped off a package at my house today.
Twirls imaginary mustache, chuckling evilly. I picked the best two hours in the last 36 to drive on the freeway. It rained so much it was like driving through an aquarium.
Hey, I'm sorry about my confuzzled post. I was taking the thread title rather literally and hadn't read the description closely enough.
Your post was exactly what this thread is all about. Kicking 2005's ass out the door and looking forward to all good things in 2006.
Naw, Spidra, I was all with the taking inspiration from your words and thinking about how I myself can improve my life by improving my outlook, etc.
What I want for 2006:
a shiny new Congress
a published short story
to stop feeling that whole puberty "Nobody understands me...I don't belong," thing and feel comfortable with myself. However that happens.
also the right "dare to be great situation"
There are probably other things, but that is where I would start.
to stop feeling that whole puberty "Nobody understands me...I don't belong," thing
Werd.
One of the interesting things as I get older is finding out just how many people feel this way. People I admire and think are great with people and on top of the world...
Spidra, your post was just right.
I gave up the whole trying-to-have-a-positive-outlook thing. I'm clinically depressed and taking drugs for it. I embrace my glass-is-half-empty attitude and the people who like me just laugh at me for it.
It ain't gonna get better so I stopped fighting it. I act grumpy and snarky when I can get away with it and pretend to be a nicer person than I am when I have to.
