I don't feel like that means we have to stop talking about what books we like and dislike and why.

Yes, but it does mean that when somebody says "I intend to name my baby Dylan" you stop saying "Dylan is a lousy name for a baby girl."

That's common politeness. Taste in baby names is much more emotionally fraught than taste in books, and in this group, that's saying something.

Or you discovered that Betsy is now in the top 100 for boys names, and that people are starting to assume that Betsy == male?

I would engage in the time-honored Indiana custom of bitching to my friends *as long as none of them had a son named Betsy*.

Am I even allowed to express my personal preference for non-androgynous, gender-specific names?

Sure. And when your chosen expression of said personal preference puts the word "kill" next to my publically announced future baby name, I'm allowed to consider that a little thoughtless.

For the record, when I made the remark about our neighbors picking a name for the daughter, I'd completely forgotten that Jessica wanted to name a child of either gender Dylan. It wasn't intentional. Admittedly, I got carried away afterward, and I really am sorry about that.

And also for the record, to me my reading tastes are just as emotionally fraught if not more so than my taste in names. I mean, I never felt like the woman who thought Annabel was a cow name was saying I was stupid, while I do often get the impression people who disparage my tastes in books think I'm intellectually inferior. Plus, there's a whole lot of overlap in my reading tastes and what I choose to write, and that's the core of who I am.

Again, I'm sorry. But I really had forgotten that there was someone here who liked the name Dylan for a girl, so when I brought the topic up I honestly had no intentions of stepping on any toes. And I apologize for being a bitch over it thereafter.

Thank you, I appreciate that.

If they name their daughter Dylan, not only am I never mowing the yard again, I'm reseeding with DANDELION SEED.

I think a girl Dylan is way more palatable than, say, Apple Paltrow. Or Kal-El Cage.

(Note to self: do not name potential sprog -- stop laughing, it could happen -- after superheroes and/or their sidekicks.)

(Note to self again: this leaves a lot of supervillain names open. Gorilla Grodd [Lastname]. Darkseid [Lastname]. LADY SHIVA BRAINIAC [Lastname]!!!)

(Addendum: am perhaps feverish. Will reconsider when not crazy.)

Amusingly, if you name something female Shiva, you will get people who are cranky because of Shiva-as-male.

Signed,

Proud owner of Lady Shiva Woo-Sen the cat. Who is always careful to explain that no, the kitten was not named after the god, she was named after the assassin.

Lex Luthor [Lastname]. It's perfect. The alliteration is pure gold.

Note to self: do not name potential sprog -- stop laughing, it could happen -- after superheroes and/or their sidekicks

Aw, no little Peter Parker L--?

Apple Paltrow

You know though, when I heard Gwyneth on the radio saying "Well, Peach is a girl's name, so why not Apple?" I really couldn't think of a good answer. Why is one fruit name merely old-fashioned and the other Baby Celebritylicious? (Note: none of my children will ever be named Apple. Or Grape, Banana, or Nectarine.)

Why is one fruit name merely old-fashioned and the other Baby Celebritylicious?

Because Ugli Fruit Paltrow really IS too mean to stick on a kid.

And just in case it wasn't perfectly clear, my original conversation with my neighbor was entirely jokey on both sides. I didn't bring up the idea of naming a girl Dylan or Ryan-- she did, and the context was, "And those are two we'd never even consider because it'd just feel weird, and y'all would probably kill us." We both laughed about it, and went on to say how we both liked the name Fiona, and wished we knew whether our other neighbors who had a Fiona meant to stay here always, because it'd be weird to have two or three Fionas in the same block, but if we all live different places it's not such an issue. It wasn't a serious conversation, and if my original post made it sound like I was jumping all over C for daring to like androgynous names while I don't, I obviously didn't word it very well.

And I really had honestly forgotten that Jessica wanted to use that name.