My Other Mother is in a wedding delimea. Her goddaughter is getting married and she's having a Destination Wedding to Costa Rica. Because they love the environment so much and want to get married in such a beautiful place. OM isn't poor, but we're talking airfare, hotel, and there's all these "outings" that the bride has planned -- one for each day that's not the wedding. so there are 3 or 4 outings. Each one over $100.

Only local fish and vegetables will be served at the reception because they want to make the least amount of enviornmental impact as possible.

Frankly, if they are so enviromentally concious they wouldn't be having the wedding there, but OM cant' say that.

I suggested that she make a very nice donation to a charity for Costa Rica's enviornment, or if she can't find one, to the Heifer Project and then send a lovely card expressing her regrets and explaining that God Daughter's devotion to the enviornment inspired the gift idea. (That way if goddaughter were the type to complain about a gift not being nice enough she cant' because it's a charitable donation and the god daughter would look petty.)

askye, that sounds like a great idea. The donation to the Costa Rican Preserve the ________ Foundation.

So, the shower is in the room the MoH has purchased using points from her husbands travels. We (the guests) are invited to hang there or by the pool, then have the shower in the room, followed by the Bachlorette Party dinner whatever and then, we can all cram into the room for 10 of us to sleep there.

It took me a while, but I just absorbed the full meaning of this. So, MoH is trying to throw a Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous shower that requires the guests to pay, while MoH DOESN'T PAY FOR ANYTHING? (Except her dinner, it sounds like, but still. What the hell kind of "hostess" pulls such tacky-ass shit? She didn't even pay for the ROOM?)

askye's Other Mother is GEEneeyous! Aimee, make a donation to the Society for Preservation of Sanity and Standards in the MOH's name and send it to the Bride as your wedding gift. You and Joe save the airfare and ease some of the emotional and finanancial strain, and let the MOH ramp up her idiocy till she explodes with it. Then you can smooth your skirt over your lap and tut-tut that you were afred the poor cowhole was heading in that direction, but far be it from you to Ever Affront the Society by pointing this out.

Fuck her. Fuck her and the jumped up stoopid ideas she rode in on.

Ow. (You obvioulsy exemplify the adage, "Living well is the best revenge.")

and

Grrrrr.....

Thanks folks, but this is all long since gone and has been worked out. My folks are very proud of what I do and that I've built myself a successful career. At one point a few years ago when I was really having financial problems and was ready to just take a job managing a Staples or something it was my father who stepped in and insisted that I stick with it and put his money on the line to support me through the lean times.

My mother and father honestly had no idea what it meant to be going into the field I had chosen and reacted out of fear. They wanted me to be comfortable and just saw how much risk was involved.

Mom's comment was borne out of that place where she just couldn't believe that someone with that kind of talent/fame is ever anyone you know. People like stars and artists exist in a totally separate universe for her, and since we weren't in that universe it only followed that I shouldn't be doing that. Don't get me wrong, what she said hurt a lot, and it hurt for a long time, but we've long since worked that out.

Askye, that is smart. She could send them coffee from here: [link]

{{Aimee}} cowhole sucks. Plus what everyone else said.

When I told my mom in undergrad that I was going to be just a theatre major and drop my other majors her response was, "But why would you do that, theatre is what talented people do."

Okay, now I want to whack ND's mother about the head and shoulders. While I'm at it, I want to explain to Destination Wedding person the ecological impact of having a bunch of people fly to Costa Rica. I've generally had the impression that Destination Wedding is shorthand for "inconveniencing as many people as possible."

Beautiful awareness ND. Good on ya. And bless them for growing too.

MoH DOESN'T PAY FOR ANYTHING?

Well, she has to pay for her airfare.

t makes gaging motion

My poor future- SIL has already started stressing a bit about wedding planning. Some of her distant relatives she doesn't like (they are mean to her Mom) are trying to invite themselves to the wedding. Her sister is trying to convince her to have it at a family farm.

My brother's joked that they'll make a website with a Wedding Stress o Meter with a red zone. As soon as the meter hits the red zone they'll elope. All guests and family members will be encouraged to check the Stressometer to see how close they are to causing an elopment.

At least I think he was joking.