Fay, I just want you to know that you are my hero.

David, if it eases your mind, every time I've seen Susan and Annabel together, Susan has been very relaxed and not at all projecting worry. She's more likely to give herself a complex than to give Annabel one. Trust me.

Susan, I'm going to go against the tide and say that if you're worried about language development, getting her tested early is a good thing. Language issues are one of the areas that can be helped tremendously by early intervention, so there's no bad here. Either she's perfectly normal, in which case, you can breathe a sigh of relief, or she's slightly language delayed, and you can get her treated before it becomes a major issue.

Hanna's language issues were treated as wait-and-see until she was almost four, and getting her on target with her talking has been twice as much work as it would have been if it had been caught at the first sign.

That said, make a list of Big Stuff (language, maybe some types of mobility) and Small Stuff (everything else), and toss the Small Stuff list in the bin. Remember that developmental milestones are more of a guideline, really, and cheerfully let the little ones slide, knowing you're on top of the big ones.

I think doing the assessment is fine, Susan. It's not going to hurt Annabel and it will give you an answer. I hope that will help you to feel more secure about what your doing - whether that's continuing what you've been doing or making some changes.

Fay, I just want you to know that you are my hero.

strikes pose.

And so to bed.

flies off, cape flapping in the breeze

Susan, don't feel guilty about taking her to get assessed. I know I told you that Mom took my brother in even though she was a speech therapist and was pretty sure he'd turn out okay. But he wasn't talking soon enough and it freaked her out and started the guilt thing.

No matter what, don't let a doctor have your peace of mind. Because if there is something wrong, there could be a number of them and they could be more fucked-up than you! Trust me. Try to find your peace of mind in you, Grasshopper. Gotta go..."Taking My Own Advice" workshop starts in twenty. ;)

I just really don't know what I'm doing, or if I'm doing any of it right at all. And I don't know if it's too late to fix anything I've done wrong, like I've missed a developmental window, because I've been avoiding all the child development books to try to keep myself from freaking out like this.

Get ye to a book store and grab yourself a copy of Mommy Guilt, STAT. Which I will do, as soon as I stop being cheap and just reading it on the sly.

We were given three child books. The only one that's worth a damn is this one: [link]

It's quite mind-easing.

OK. I'm going to call the pede's office, say what I'm worried about and why, and ask what resources they recommend, given that Dr B is on vacation, to make sure everything is OK, whether that's going to one of the other doctors in the clinic, getting the assessment through the public health people, etc. And I'm going to say that I'm serious about this, and that while I understand I'm probably worried when she's perfectly normal, if she is normal, someone needs to take the time to talk with me seriously, hear my concerns, and explain why they're unfounded. No happy little "of course she's normal" handwaves allowed.

I have the Leach book. I'll have to get it off the shelves and see if I can handle reading it--I gave up on What to Expect after realizing I was way overanalyzing their monthly development charts. I'll look for Mommy Guilt.

Time for Annabel's dinner....

Best of luck to you and Dylan and Annabel about the tests, btw. My Crip Power thing doesn't extend to recruitment. The community would love to have her but be just as glad for her if it were otherwise. I have enough toasters for influencing Buffista movie rental habits. And if there's something, it's not because you were bad, right? You didn't give her anything.

What to Expect is ooky. It makes me cranky. The Leach book is soothing and very much non-lecturing.

Your plan sounds good.