Not being taken seriously really sucks, sj. I wish I had good advice for remedying that. But a hot bath sounds like an excellent stopgap measure.
Jayne: Well... I don't like the idea of someone hearin' what I'm thinkin'. Inara: No one likes the idea of hearing what you're thinking.
'Objects In Space'
Spike's Bitches 23: We've mastered the power of positive giving up.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
-t - Apr 21, 2005 5:15:31 am PDT #4794 of 10001
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
Gudanov - Apr 21, 2005 5:16:34 am PDT #4795 of 10001
Coding and Sleeping
Where are these Lily pics? I keep missing them.
Scrappy - Apr 21, 2005 5:17:18 am PDT #4796 of 10001
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Don't get angry. Br cheery and perky and thank her very much for her "suggestions" and tell her that some of them will be very helpful. That way YOU are defining them as "suggestions which you might or might not follow, since you are the boss of you" but you are calm and rational, so that doesn't give her anything to react to.
I think your mom might always make suggestions. I know BF's mom still does to all her four children--and the oldest one is 43 with three kids of her own. They have all learned to ignore her after years of trying to get her to stop failed. For her, telling her kids what to do is being a mom, and if she stoped, it would be like ignoring them. She can't NOT do it, even though her kids ignore her 95% of the time.
Topic!Cindy - Apr 21, 2005 5:18:47 am PDT #4797 of 10001
What is even happening?
With Leif, I rolled him up in a towel and then put the eye-drops in. All wrapped up like a burrito, he couldn't put up his usual fight.Chris will be five (yikes!) on Sunday. I don't think I have a towel that big.
Cindy, I've covered my eyes and am singing "lalalalalala" at the thought of giving eye drops.
What semi-worked with Julia, is having her look up, then pulling open the lower lid, and aiming the drops for that little pocket. When they're younger, it is easier, because they don't get freaked out by concepts in quite the same way, and seem more able in some way, to process a minor inconvenience without holding a grudge.
Getting rolled up in a towel is just good fun until someone tries to put drops in your eye.
Hee!
Cashmere - Apr 21, 2005 5:18:58 am PDT #4798 of 10001
Now tagless for your comfort.
You're not pathetic and whiny, sj. You're just frustrated. Hopefully, your mother will become a little more aware that some of this is HER and learn to trust you. Maybe taking a less emotional approach with her might help--or keeping your answers to her mother-henning short. She might eventually pick up on that. Other than that, I don't have very much good advice. My twin and I were the youngest, so my folks were very hands-off with us, having BTDT three times already.
Boy's down for a nap. He's been whiny and snotty all morning and cried for about a half an hour before succumbing to sleep. Colds SUCK.
sj - Apr 21, 2005 5:19:24 am PDT #4799 of 10001
"There are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea."
Don't get angry. Br cheery and perky and thank her very much for her "suggestions" and tell her that some of them will be very helpful. That way YOU are defining them "as suggestions which you might or might not follow, since you are the boss of you" but you are calm and rational,so that doesn't give her anything to react to.
I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to pretend like an order is a suggestion, and I am not good at being calm when all of my buttons are being pushed.
Gudanov - Apr 21, 2005 5:21:56 am PDT #4800 of 10001
Coding and Sleeping
Chris will be five (yikes!) on Sunday.
That's tough, maybe a small blanket? Leif is tough enough to do things to and he's only two and a half, I hope he gets more cooperative by the time he's five.
Scrappy - Apr 21, 2005 5:23:22 am PDT #4801 of 10001
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Well, now is the perfect opportunity to learn how. It'll be hard the first couple of times, but it will get easier and then you will have more freedom, which is the ultimate goal. Acting like an order is a suggestion robs it of its power. Pretending buttons aren't being pushed, even though it may require going into a closet and screaming afterwards, is a way to make the button-pusher stop. In effect, you are training your mother to behave to you the way you want her to by changing your behavior.
Laura - Apr 21, 2005 5:24:33 am PDT #4802 of 10001
Our wings are not tired.
Pretty wee baby! Lovely Plei.
Poor Chris. I hated the taste of the drops for pinkeye. Do you still get the nasty taste after you do the drops?
The boys were pretty cool about that stuff. Bobby wouldn't take pills, but drops and liquids were no problem.
sj - Apr 21, 2005 5:25:47 am PDT #4803 of 10001
"There are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea."
Thanks, Robin. I will have to try that. I am also going to send an e-mail to my therapist.