I am not...I am not the damsel in distress. I am not some case. I have to work this. I've lived in a cave for 5 years in a world where they killed my kind like cattle. I am not going to be cut down by some monster flu. I am better than that. What a wonder...how very scared I am.

Fred ,'A Hole in the World'


Natter 34: Freak With No Name  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


tommyrot - Apr 21, 2005 10:46:19 am PDT #7689 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

The sordid tale of a desperate penguin

The TV housewives of Wisteria Lane have got nothing on this widow, who stole her neighbors' husbands, fell into the flippers of a younger male, and now is winging it as a single mom.

First she thoroughly breached all sense of propriety among her penguin peers by stealing spouses, brawling with another female and seducing an uninitiated adolescent male.

Now, separated from the rest of the Brookfield Zoo colony, Zurita has likely become the world's first successful single-parent penguin, raising a chick fathered by a much younger companion who can't be bothered to help out.

Her soap-opera story has delighted zookeepers, who believe that in watching Zurita they have gleaned important insights into improving the husbandry and genetic diversity of captive Humboldt penguins.

....

With Zorro gone and no available male in the colony, Zurita began looking for love in the wrong places, by soliciting males already spoken for.

One ended up giving her a fertile egg, but when keepers discovered the male was Zurita's cousin, they took the egg away to avoid the dangers of inbreeding. Still, Zurita continued to look for male conquests.

She continued to solicit males from established pairs," Broniewicz said.

When she approached a male named Popero, his mate, Bumblebee, confronted Zurita in a violent tussle.

Penguins have sharp beaks and a strong bite, and the two females went after each other's faces, trying to cut each other and pounding away with their powerful wing flippers.

....

[link]


§ ita § - Apr 21, 2005 10:52:55 am PDT #7690 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Zurita has likely become the world's first successful single-parent penguin

Sure.


tommyrot - Apr 21, 2005 10:54:13 am PDT #7691 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

Zurita has likely become the world's first successful single-parent penguin

Sure.

Yeah, I have my doubts about that part....


Jessica - Apr 21, 2005 10:56:01 am PDT #7692 of 10001
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset

Zurita has likely become the world's first successful single-parent penguin

Sure

Yeah. The first in captivity, they mean.


Topic!Cindy - Apr 21, 2005 10:56:06 am PDT #7693 of 10001
What is even happening?

JZ made me go look for the Pope's Livejournal. That didn't take long. (Sadly, not as funny as I hoped it would be.)

Oh brave new world. It really didn't take long at all, did it?

Date created: 2005-04-19 10:06:51

the address is benedictxvi@vatican.va
What salutation would you use to write a letter to the pope, anyhow?


Jessica - Apr 21, 2005 10:56:47 am PDT #7694 of 10001
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset

What salutation would you use to write a letter to the pope, anyhow?

"Yo, Ben,"


§ ita § - Apr 21, 2005 10:57:03 am PDT #7695 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Why she gotta have a Takeshawanniqua name, anyway?


tommyrot - Apr 21, 2005 10:57:09 am PDT #7696 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

What salutation would you use to write a letter to the pope, anyhow?

YOUR INCREASED SIZE WILL PLEASE HER.


amych - Apr 21, 2005 10:57:39 am PDT #7697 of 10001
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?

In a letter, "Your Holiness". In email, "Hi, pope!"

(never mind. Tommyrot wins.)


Gudanov - Apr 21, 2005 11:02:44 am PDT #7698 of 10001
Coding and Sleeping

I wonder what Pope spam looks like.

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