Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.

Mal ,'Serenity'


The Great Write Way, Chapter Two: Twice upon a time...  

A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.


Typo Boy - May 18, 2006 9:01:05 am PDT #6746 of 10001
Calli: My people have a saying. A man who trusts can never be betrayed, only mistaken.Avon: Life expectancy among your people must be extremely short.

T!C it was wonderful piece. I think the new organization may make it stronger for an audience who has not shared the experience so much - non-church goers.

It start with a narrative fact (non-church goer, not thinking about jesus grandma is dead.) then a commonplace scent from a commonplace activity (unwrapping a mint) evokes memories of lesss common place and invokes a mystery. And then you've got the story, the church and being slipped the mints, and drawing in the program. And the powerful ending, her and Christ chilling amongst the roses.

I was a little reluctant to give this feedback. Obviously, organization in fiction is a very personal thing; what order to tell things in is very subjective. But this other order felt so right, I thought it might be useful.


Pete, Husband of Jilli - May 19, 2006 7:34:12 pm PDT #6747 of 10001
"I've got a gun! I've got a mother-flippin' gun!" - Moss, The IT Crowd

I am so utterly adorable.
My denial of same, deplorable.
I'd quite like a willy
Either wet or dry
It may seem mad, but it's no lie,
I'd like a tiara before I die.


Typo Boy - May 19, 2006 7:45:53 pm PDT #6748 of 10001
Calli: My people have a saying. A man who trusts can never be betrayed, only mistaken.Avon: Life expectancy among your people must be extremely short.

One can but try.
Glad you came by.
If just to say hi.
You're one great guy.


Pete, Husband of Jilli - May 19, 2006 7:47:51 pm PDT #6749 of 10001
"I've got a gun! I've got a mother-flippin' gun!" - Moss, The IT Crowd

May I ask why
Your esteem is so high,
That if I were nigh,
You'd buy me pie?


Pete, Husband of Jilli - May 19, 2006 8:32:13 pm PDT #6750 of 10001
"I've got a gun! I've got a mother-flippin' gun!" - Moss, The IT Crowd

In the Hospitality Suite
They thought it'd be neat
To pretend to be Pete
And play up the 'Sweet'

But now I am back
To find I've been hacked
Facing a fuckton of flack
Though I didn't do jack

But everything's fine
Pay heed to the signs
Cos after this line
Vengeance is mine...

Have camera. Prepare for war, mother-fuckers.

Luv, Pete


Strix - May 21, 2006 5:43:04 pm PDT #6751 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

Strix - May 21, 2006 5:43:10 pm PDT #6752 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

Strix - May 25, 2006 5:20:00 pm PDT #6753 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

Wow, I totally killed it dead. Deader than a dead naked mole rat.


SailAweigh - May 25, 2006 5:28:03 pm PDT #6754 of 10001
Nana korobi, ya oki. (Fall down seven times, stand up eight.) ~Yuzuru Hanyu/Japanese proverb

Nah, Erin. We're all just in resting mode after the F2F. I love what you posted of your story so far. Are you going to give us more?


Strix - May 25, 2006 5:29:06 pm PDT #6755 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

I have more, yes. I just didn't want to innundate with the unwanted,