And I posted above to the same effect. Depection of uber-casual sex on TV does not = culture treats sex uber-casually.
I think that our society treats sex (get ready for a big contradiction!) both too casually and too seriously.
Too casually because there is often the sense that you should be getting laid as often as possible, relationship or no. And because of the attitude mentioned upthread that if you haven't had sex by a certain age, you're a weirdo.
Too seriously because, and I'm going to quote a movie here, much to my chagrin -- sex should mean *something,* but it doesn't have to mean *everything.*
In retrospect, there's a couple of guys I wish I hadn't slept with because I don't think I knew them well enough.
Somehow I made it to majority without tightly linking sex with emotional intimacy. In fact, the guy I lost my virginity to said "You should try it with someone you're in love with -- it's even better." To which I said "Oh, hell no! If it gets better than this, I'll never do anything else."
So there's the idea of not knowing them well enough to predict they'd insist on watersports with Fido -- that I'd regret, but just knowing them as a person, can make things better, but isn't required.
For me.
I'm disturbed by how the religous right has become the voice of christianity when it seems to concentrate so much being anti-abortion and anti-gay and ignores social and economic justice.
I think I need a macro for my rant on this subject. It would save
so
much time.
When I was in college (late 80s) I recall seeing a book that set forth the idea that America was God's chosen nation and was to do His will upon the earth. I was far more conservative then than I am now, and I still thought the idea was hella scary and could only lead to very, very bad things.
Reconstructionism. Scary, scary stuff.
[link]
And, to completely contradict myself, there's a couple of guys that I had, well, fuck-buddy relationships with that I don't regret one bit.
I think the ones I do regret was that there was a pretense of emotional intimacy that wasn't really there.
On this issue, I am Hec.
Me too. (Which is pretty surprising, given how generally intolerant I am of Hec's tendency to oversimplify moral/social issues. But on these...yeah. Right there with him.)
We treat sex more seriously than we treat life and death. There is far less outcry over graphic violence and depictions of death than of sexuality in all forms of media.
I think the ones I do regret was that there was a pretense of emotional intimacy that wasn't really there.
The pretense is the ick for me too. Please don't propose marriage after picking me up, but right before sex. If you still know me in a week, it would still be too soon.
So there's the idea of not knowing them well enough to predict they'd insist on watersports with Fido -- that I'd regret, but just knowing them as a person, can make things better, but isn't required.
::Nodding like crazy::
For me, emotional intimacy comes from truly knowing a person, not from sex.
