(((Nora))) I don't even know what happened to make this day crap all over you, but I am vibing hard for it to go the hell away and let you wake up to a Friday that is golden.

I recognized Lyra's tag right away. Spoken by Krakow, bitterly, while riding his dirtbike in angry little circles around Angela, IIRC, as she changes in the bushes and slounges on the sidewalk waiting for Rayanne to pick her up for their illicit trip to Let's Bolt. And I haven't even seen it in, like, two years.

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My circadian rhythm, out of step. Stupid different drummer getting me all confuzzled. Wide awake. In a few hours though, sleeping like a baby.

My shrink takes great notes and has an amazing memory. When he’s filling out forms, though, he’ll sometimes just ask me for the list of meds I’ve been on.

I changed doctors a few times and I really really really should have kept a list. I think I meant to make one at some point. It would only help me.

“Have you looked at the list of drugs we’ve tried? They have to cover it. There’s not much left for you to try!” And he was right. They did.

This is still great news, vw. Makes me happy.

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Cass, are you still up?

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I changed doctors a few times and I really really really should have kept a list. I think I meant to make one at some point. It would only help me.

I'm so out of step with what's happened in my treatment. My memory is so terrible. I had to fill out some paperwork for Social Security at the beginning of January, and I couldn't come up with the dates of my hospitalizations in the last two years. I had to request discharge summaries from both hospitals so I had the dates. So, as a New Year's Resolution, I started a new LiveJournal where I write detailed reports of each of my appointments. I think it'll really help. Plus, since my memory is so bad, it's a tracking device for me, so I can see my improvement. Sometimes it's hard to see...

This is still great news, vw. Makes me happy.

Thank you. And I hope you got some sleep, girl.

Timelies everyone! I've got a few pieces of homework to finish up before I hopefully jump in the shower (I say hopefully, 'cause I"m hoping it's got decent water pressure again).

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In a few hours though, sleeping like a baby.

Heh. This phrase. Fallacy. But I hope you get some rest.

GRONK.

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Good morning, all. I'm a work and without coffee. That is just wrong, wrong, wrong. I may have to sneak out and get some before the students show up.

I also woke up with a killer backache and would pawn a limb right now for a real massage.

I have work to do right now, but what am I doing instead? Browsing California real estate sites. Bad Kristin!

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Good morning everyone. I think I'm starting to get into the swing of being back in the States, but it's a bit daunting to realise my life isn't going to settle down for quite some time. It's pretty different from the last six weeks of vacation I had. Also, I'm sick sickity sick sick sick--I haven't slept the last two nights because I couldn't swallow for the pain. Applesauce is my friend.

Kristin, are you contemplating a move out to CA? Any particular part?

Leave for class in half an hour...it's bad to skip the first day of class, right?

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I made an appointment with a personal trainer for 9 a.m. I'm so stupid! That doesn't even leave time for coffee!!!

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SA, we're moving to California some time in the next couple of years. Exactly where and when is nebulous at this point.

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checking in. Thanks for the hugs and good vibes, they were nice to see today. I logged off the computer last night and curled up in bed, Tom holding me while I hyperventilated, twitched, moaned, cried, and spazzed out.

Today feels a bit better.

Suicide memorials are of the FUCKING SUCK. Oh my Jesus fucking gawd.

Then the trek through the rain, walking around snowdrifts into traffic to catch a bus, to get downtown, the losing of the costly combo T/bus pass, the flooding out of Kendall Square, the walking and walking and walking in the rain, the throbbing of my foot, all inflamed _ the plantar faciitis, the fucking up of the car company I booked to pick my grandmother up, and the overwheleming feeling of awfullness and sorrow and dirtiness through it all.

Things to do today:
1) get bus pass so that I can get to and from work this month, and so that we can get our insurance discount
2) successfully coordinate picking my grandmother up at the airport in Friday rush hour traffic
3) call the venue for the party tomorrow and let them know to decrease the count by another person, and alert them to 2 vegetarians
4) try not to suffer any more panic attacks about dealing with the cluelessness, neediness, and alcoholism of my family this weekend
5) consider therapy
6) fight the urge to buy and smoke a pack of cigarettes and drink till I pass out.

I know so many people have it so much worse than I do. But I'm tired of each and every little thing going wrong and becoming a large obstacle. I'm just so tired.

Christ, what a whiny rant.

Oh yeah, to that list:

7) do the work they FUCKING PAY ME TO DO here.

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