Is there a website out there where you can bash opening acts? If not, maybe I should start one. I went to see Denice Franke tonight (excellent singer-songwriter; toured with Nanci Griffith for years). The opening act made my ears bleed. Among other things, she broke what I think of as the first commandment for a singer-songwriter: never write a song out of your range. I was good; I just whimpered inaudibly and thought about throwing french fries.

We are listening to a CD by a German duo called Stereo Total

I thought they were more of a French band. I'm probably wrong. I second tommy's rec of their Salt N' Peppa cover. I've got some of their videos on DVD too, and they're cool.

The worst opening act I ever heard opened for the Decemberists on their second D.C. show. I have blocked the gentleman's name, but I remember an accordian and yowling. I escaped to the bar pretty quickly.

And I had 5,946 songs and 15.5 days of music on my iTunes as of two weeks ago, but I've since added two albums, so ... 5,970 songs or so total? There are 4440 on my iPod. Top artist is probably U2 (huge surprise).

Hec, they're a Berlin band, but the female half of the duo is French. She's lived in Germany since the '80s.

Hec, they're a Berlin band, but the female half of the duo is French. She's lived in Germany since the '80s.

I think I was fooled by her French accent on the English lyrics. I think she's got a solo record out too.

There have been plenty of times I've gone to a show specifically to see the opener (not to mention all the times I've been the opener), so the whole concept of "worst opening act" irks me somewhat. Opening acts are abused enough by clubs, their soundmen, and sometimes even the headliners. Wouldn't it be better to just talk about the worst band you're seen, irrespective of where their name appeared on the marquis?

Wouldn't it be better to just talk about the worst band you're seen, irrespective of where their name appeared on the marquis?

Bonnie Bramlett, post Delaney and Bonnie, at the Capitol Theatre in Passaic, NJ, in 1974. The gold standard for bad performances. God, she was awful. She was swearing at the audience as she left the stage.

She was the second of three acts.

Speaking of openers, the Dresden Dolls are opening for Nine Inch Nails on a string of dates across the country. P-C: the closest they come to your neck of the woods is Toronto on May 9 and Chicago May 12-13.

Speaking of openers, the Dresden Dolls are opening for Nine Inch Nails on a string of dates across the country.

That's kinda tempting. I don't know if it's tempting enough for me to go see the Trentlet perform live again, but I'll think about it.

Comments/reactions to some recent posts:

Jon, thanks for the WKRP link. I loved that show. I knew that music was changed for syndication but didn't realize how extensive it was, and I was completely unaware of the redubbing of lines because of it. ("Hold my order, terrible dresser" for "Hold me closer, tiny dancer" - wha? Btw, the INS agent in that episode was Sam "Holland Manners" Anderson.)

Jon, Hayden, other musicians, and anyone else interested either in music theory or pure sonics: I just heard a fascinating interview (not archived yet) with a composer/pianist/piano-tuner-refurbisher-theorist named Michael Harrison. I'll let him describe his harmonic piano and just intonation tunings, but I will note that on Soundcheck he plays one of his compositions on a piano with standard tuning and then we hear the "same" composition on one of his rejiggered instruments. Cool stuff.

Glad to hear the Miles love. I think the Pablo in "Blues for Pablo" was Paul Chambers, the great bassist, but I didn't find anything to back that up. If I remember I'll check Gil Evans' bio (Castles Made Of Sound) when I get home. ("Mr. P.C." on Coltrane's Giant Steps is a Chambers tribute.) "Blues for Pablo"'s album-mate "My Ship" is one of my favorite Miles recordings, certainly a peak of the Davis/Evans collaboration.

Re: "opening bands" - when I was managing a friend's band we went through a weird period where the bookers would tell us, "Oh, you're headlining." Woohoo! We're headlining - except that they just meant that we'd be going on last. So we'd tell our fans to come to the show because we were headlining & needed to turn out a good crowd. They'd come out on a Tuesday or Wednesday night, and at 12:30 we'd still be 45 minutes from going on! "Sorry, guys. We love you, but tomorrow's a work day." We'd go on at 1:30 and play to half a dozen people. Ay yi yi.