Well, first, Buffy and Riley had to break up in S5. It was part of the "stripping everything away" motif that made it impossible for her to let Dawn die in "The Gift."

I'm in the minority that thinks that Buffy did make a relationship error early in S5. Not by ignoring him in the sense of not worrying about his needs. But by freezing him out and not letting him be supportive. The only thing she let him do was babysit Dawn. Once. She goofed by refusing his help. However, because Buffy was dealing with a genuine crisis, I'd call this a minor error.

But Riley knew as early as "The Replacement" that Buffy didn't love him (and I agree with that view). And instead of being mature and quietly ending the relationship immediately or after Joyce's crisis was over, he sought out new company while keeping the relationship going. Cheating -- one of the two worst relationship sins possible (the other: abuse).

What ME could have done was have Riley tell Buffy that he felt frozen out of the relationship and had decided to transfer (to U of Iowa?). Voila! No more vamp hos. No return to the military (out of character, as far as Riley had one). Less ridiculous for Buffy to blame herself.

I had liked Riley throughout season 4 and 5 and found ItW annoying because they made it blatent cheating. There were ways they could have had Riley getting deliberately bit which would have worked better, I think. They could have used it as a drug metaphor.(Riley, in a fit of jealous stupidity seeks out Sandy. Much to his surprise, it makes him feel physically better than he has since the Initiative stopped their experiments)

It could also be thrill-seeking or a subconcious death wish.

After being caught Riley realizes he needs to get his head together, and he can't do that in Sunnydale. Voila! Riley leaves, Buffy feels sad, but there is no real blame.

I still think that season 5 would have worked better if Riley had turned out to somehow be the Glory-host. Maybe getting the initiatve implants fully removed allowed her to manifest or some such.

I had a whole alternate season mapped out in my head at one point, as several things would have to be done in at least a different chronology, if not completely different events, but I can't remember all the details now.

I came up with the idea after hearing all the rumours that Xander was originally supposed to be the Glory-host, which also would have played out better, I think (they might have ended up using the Toth stick again rather the Troll-"god" hammer).

Just how big an HSQ would it have been for Giles to do what he did to Ben if it was Riley or Xander? Even Riley would have had a much bigger impact than Ben.

I don't think Giles would have been able to do it if Xander had been the Glory host. I hope Giles wouldn't have been able to do it—that's a level of Watcherly pragmatism I'm very uncomfortable seeing come from the show's father figure, and would contradict to some degree what we found out about him in "Helpless."

Although I think it's perfectly in line with Wesley's character on the spinoff.

I don't think Giles would have been able to do it if Xander had been the Glory host. I hope Giles wouldn't have been able to do it—that's a level of Watcherly pragmatism I'm very uncomfortable seeing come from the show's father figure, and would contradict to some degree what we found out about him in "Helpless."

It would have had to play out very differently. Xander would never have tried to give up Dawn like Ben did (I don't think Riley would have either), and I suspect both Xander and Riley would have asked to be put down under the circumstances. I don't think Buffy could have done it even then, but I bet Giles could.

It was the fact that she didn't lean on him enough that somehow emasculated him.

I think that the writing in that section is why folks are still up in arms over Into the Woods and then Are You Now. Because I think what ME wanted to convey was that Buffy was shutting people out emotionally and withdrawing into herself. That's certainly the thread that continues through S6 and S7.

The failure of her relationship with Riley is supposed to be indicative that Buffy has never really recovered from killing Angel, and that she's emotionally closed. That her slayer duties are oppressive and damaging to her emotionally and the way she compensated was to pull into herself. The whole inferiority/superiority complex Knox diagnosed.

But instead in their haste to get Riley offscreen, the writers went for the dramatic suckjob and (I think most disastrously) they made the focal point of his complaint to Buffy that she didn't turn to him during Joyce's illness. This is supposed to read to us that Buffy won't turn to anybody else for emotional support - but instead it inevitably paints Riley as insecure, needy and completely not being Supporting Boyfriend During A Crisis.

Also Xander's speech in ItW was a misfire. He's supposed to be Buffy's trusted don't-bullshit-yourself friend. He's supposed to be conveying something like "Don't give up on the idea that you could have a healthy relationship with a human being, a real emotional life." In context, it's hard to hear his speech as anything except "It's all your fault. You're a cold bitch. You drove him away. You should accept a vamp-junkie boyfriend because what else are you going to get?"

"Into the Woods" transcript:

BUFFY: The guy got himself bit by a vampire! (Xander is surprised) He lied to me. He ran around behind my back and almost got himself killed! And now he tells me that he's leaving with some covert military operation at midnight unless *I* convince him not to. Now tell me that you understand. Because I sure as hell don't.

-- which reads pretty much like Buffy telling someone to me.

And yes, Xander knew about Parker. Buffy told him herself ("I'm a slut, I'm a ho" in "Beer Bad," plus Xander remarking on the idiocy of any guy who'd turn down the Buff in "Fear, Itself.").

which reads pretty much like Buffy telling someone to me.

You could argue that Xander understood it as "Riley went patrolling without telling me and got bit." I think that between the language she used in that speech and her emotional reaction to voluntary biting earlier in the episode, it wouldn't be unreasonable to expect him to put two and two together, but I can see where the people who say he couldn't have known are coming from.

Been a while since I saw ITW, but I remember his speech as "Make up your mind. And I'd better make up mine."

NSM pro-Riley as anti-dithery-Buffy.

If Aimee were around she might even throw in the C word.

Perkins, this truly brightened my morning. I laughed my butt off!

Also seconding that it should be FaithnBuffy4EVAH!!!!