Also, I want to marry Matt's post, and I want all of Nutty's laws and corollaries on a t-shirt.

I've lately developed a hankering for a t-shirt saying "Fetch the Gimp". No good can come of this.

PS: Steph, I don't even know what you're talking about, but it seems snotty.

Actually, it's not that I saw a specific person being pissy as the problem, but rather repeated incidences of pissyness becoming more accepted, and hurting more people - newbs and long termers alike. Naming names of past problems didn't seem like a positive thing, but rather asking for a slight refocussing on issues/tone/approach that at one time was the norm here - friendlyness - seemed like the way to go. Perhaps I did that poorly.

Well, yeah. *g*

Coulda saved a million posts and a lot of hard feelings if you'd worded it that way in the first place, even if the perception of "the norm" is probably slightly shaded by nostalgia. What it ended up feeling like was that people you knew and cared about were feeling slighted and put-upon by a couple of people, and you were there to issue the holy smackdown from on high.

WRT the increase in brittle behaviour, I don't know that there is a solution. The combination of the political reality of right now, the economic reality of right now, and the increased size of the board means that comfortable's not a place we can easily get to.

I really hope the people who think the board as a whole is getting snotty will call people on it, when specific things are said.

(italics mine)

Yes. This. Otherwise, I think people will continue to get defensive, which only breeds rudeness, snippiness, misunderstandings, etc.

It is not always easy for some people (me included) to speak up. If you choose not to speak up, be it on the board or in backchannel, then people won't know your opinion on a matter, and there's a chance that some people will think that silence equals consent.

Do we need to add stuff to the site ettiquette along the lines of "just about everyone feels ignored at one point or another" and "no one person speaks for the board" and "we value our independence, so anything that smacks of preaching will garner a very bad reaction"?

I think that could help. Also love Nutty's Corollary (dear god how do you spell that?) or Law, whichever it was (the thing she just posted; is it FAQed? It's been too long since I've delved there.

Didn't get the Yoko Factor thing either.

Teppy, what are you talking about?

The Buffy episode The Yoko Factor, where Spike split up the Scoobies, but told Adam that he just exacerbated tensions that had already been there.

That's what this entire thing feels like to me.

PS: Steph, I don't even know what you're talking about, but it seems snotty.

Erk. Didn't mean for it to be snotty, really really. It had just occurred to me all of a sudden, and as is my wont, I posted without thinking how it sounded.

I think I'll stop posting here.

"no one person speaks for the board"

While I see why this might reassure some people, I also don't want to make that part of the Official Statement of this site, if only because new people might be better off assuming that a chucking under the chin may be because one has transgressed on community standards. (IOW, they are kind of speaking for the board.) If another person disagrees with the chucking, that should show to the new person that it's a colorable point.

I think, though, it may be helpful to say that everyone feels ignored at some point. Although that may also have unintended effects for [for us, because of] people who might be deliberately ignored.

I'm a meanie.

Anyway, in describing this thing to Bob last night, he said we're kind of like an anarchic collective. Which in some ways is true, because anything that smacks of domination tends to get shot down real quick.

eta what is in brackets

WRT the increase in brittle behaviour, I don't know that there is a solution. The combination of the political reality of right now, the economic reality of right now, and the increased size of the board means that comfortable's not a place we can easily get to.

Is that kind of what you're talking about with "The Yoko Factor," Teppy?

If so, I agree with you. I'm not just seeing it on the board, either. I'm finding that people in general have recently been much more on edge, tense, worried, snappish, and ill-at-ease than I would expect.

The combination of the political reality of right now, the economic reality of right now, and the increased size of the board means that comfortable's not a place we can easily get to.

Sure we can, but people need to let things roll off their back a bit more easily, and that's something people can only do for themselves.

I love this board, and have been a part of this community for a long, long time, and know many folks around here IRL. Even used to be a stompy. I'm invested.

But at the end of the day, it's just a posting board. I'm near incapable of taking too much personally. But that's my damage, no one else's.

We've been here before. Repeatedly.We'll be here again. It all blows over. Love y'all, but I think this--as far as I can tell, and I'll admit I'm having trouble following-- all has had little to do with any board policy or cultural problem than it does folks wanting to talk about their feelings.