did I insult?

Just to be clear, I am for warning offensive posters.

Thanks Jess but I'd rather not go through it.

ETA: You did not insult, msbelle. I'm just not up for a go round on the issue is all. I'ma take a break instead.

I hesitate to mention another topic, but it's come up more than once now- what has happened to Bitches? Not to single out Plei, but how has the community there changed so that you no longer feel comfortable? If posters who have been vocal and active (and there are a few, I think) leave a thread for a reason besides just not having enough time, I feel that should be addressed. It's clear something has changed. A few months ago, Bitches was catching up to Natter in sheer number of posts. Now, midway through the day for everyone, I find there have only been around 50 since last night.

I've never watched Angel, or any of the genre shows, or written fanfic. Bitches and Natter have become this community for me. I've been lurking since TT, and most of you probably don't know me, which is my own fault. For some reason, I just have a hard time posting, although I have leaned on the board a bit lately. Also, I was in college and working full time- as of two weeks ago, I'm not doing either of those things anymore. I hoped to become a more active member of the board now that I'm not constantly going to be a few hundred posts behind. Now I'm finding that people whose thoughts and stories have become a part of my daily life aren't comfortable in Bitches anymore, and I see the number of posts plummeting, and it makes me really sad. I know you're not all here for my own enjoyment, obviously, but I wish there could be some explanation, and maybe it could be addressed. I want it to be the way it used to be.

First of all, we HAVE A PROCEDURE to address inappropriate posts.

Gotta say I'm with msbelle and Jesse on this.

You can talk all you want about being conflict avoidy and stressed out by these talks, but it just makes me think about Sophia coming in here day after day during the voting procedure debates, trying to hammer it out even though it was making her cry almost every day. And she did it because she cared enough about the board to want to ensure its future.

If you can't be arsed to use the methods that people worked so hard to institute, then it's on you.

If Gloomcookie doesn't think it's inappropriate enough to warrant disciplinary action then that (to me) defines it as a minor infraction.

Which is, exactly how I would've described it. I mean, I saw the discussion heading that way and I felt like waving my hands in the air, "Wait! People take their baby names more seriously than job security! Don't!" But it didn't seem like an ad hominem attack.

what has happened to Bitches?

Yeah, I'd rather not bring this into discussion. Because threads change because different people want different things. Not because anybody is doing anything wrong. It's the natural life cycle of a thread (or board). There's no way to address it without it being a critique of (legitimate) individual style.

FWIW, I think Minearvearse has sucked up a lot of the activity lately.

Poor Sophia. And now she's too overworked to even hang out here!

Oh, and for the record, I know it's always hard for you, Beverly, but you consistently make really great posts in here (and around b.org, of course, but that's not the same).

edit: good point, David.

If Gloomcookie doesn't think it's inappropriate enough to warrant disciplinary action then that (to me) defines it as a minor infraction. Which is, exactly how I would've described it.

I never said that and I would describe it as insulting and offensive (and I'm not even talking about the name thing - it was the fairly clear implication that my family and I are not intelligent that pushed it over the line for me). What I said was that I'm not up for debating it to death and for (I'm sure) getting pissed all over again. I'm done with it and wishing we had an ENUF filter.

FTR, the proposals about how to warn, what happens when warned and so forth, is here: msbelle "Sunnydale Press" Apr 19, 2003 12:02:50 am PDT

I was unable to find that info in the etiquette, FAQ, or How-to. It should be somewhere.

And

What I said was that I'm not up for debating it to death

specifically when you have tried to talk it out in thread and move something here, it doesn't have to be you debating so much as people either supporting it or not. If 10 people do then there is a warning. Period. That's It.

You can talk all you want about being conflict avoidy and stressed out by these talks...

Hey, people are coming forward and saying "X makes me uncomfortable". I think we can listen and try to respond out of, you know, the goodness of our hearts and the wish for widespread happiness.

Seriously. Why SHOULD they be stressed to tears to be heard when we are perfectly intelligent people capable of taking others wishes into account even if they DON'T post them loudly and repeatedly?