It turned out well — Dad agreed to give us the guns and wasn’t unduly angry. What we found out during the visit is that his hallucinations have been back for a while, and they’re really vivid and have continuity from day to day (he hallucinates that people are in his apartment).

Whenever we’ve talked to him on the phone, he’s more lucid than he’s been in years, AND he didn’t tell us the hallucinations were back, so we thought he was doing well. But also (and I realize how weird this sounds) he seems very mentally sound…except for the hallucinations. So we’re baffled.

We’ll be following up this week to make sure he makes an appointment with the geriatrician so this can get sorted out.

But the most important thing was to get Dad’s guns, which we did. They’re in my brother’s in-law’s gun safe now.

My bro is at my mom’s house, and I am exhausted and everything is sore, from my toes to my head. I’m not setting the alarm for tomorrow (though I will be working when I get up).

Gud- you are autistic. Everyone who is autistic -and a lot of people who aren't-get overstimulated in crowds and events and having to be social.

That doesn't make you stupid or a failure or wrong or bad.

It means that afterwards you probably do need to hide in a way, find ways to destress. Do something like wear noise cancelling earmuffs, lie down in a dark space, and lie under a weighted blanket. that's what I would need to do, you may need to do something else.

But again, that doesn't make you stupid or wrong or a bad person.

Your wife is the one that is in the wrong. I know you don't think we are being fair or that we don't understand and I get that you want to defend your wife from criticism but-- your wife is in the wrong. She is not being a good spouse or a good person.

I really wish you could a therapist to talk to , especially one who specializes in autism to help you figure out how too navigate life better and be able to understand what you need and how to advocate for it and set boundaries etc. It helped me immensely to be able to better understand and not feel terrible about why I struggled with things or couldn't do things. But also someone who you can talk to about your wife and help figure out what is best for you as a person, even if it means not being married to her.

That doesn't make you a bad person either.

You need to take care of yourself. And your loved ones and family members are supposed to be understanding about it even if they don't really understand (if that makes sense).

Teppy I'm glad it turned out well. I get why you didn't realize there was something more going on if he is more lucid and not telling you about the hallucinations.

I hope his doctor is able to figure out something.

So glad it worked out ok for now Teppy! Fingers crossed a doc can help him with the hallucinations (either getting rid of them or at least working with them to not encourage gun violence??)

I was on a boat for 8 hours so now I feel like my bed is gently rocking. Love it.

Teppy, I'm so glad it went so well. Although yeah, hallucinations are not good. But still, things are much better now.

Gud, listen to askye, for she is wise.

Yay for fewer guns in the hands of people actively experiencing hallucination. Glad it went as smoothly as could be hoped for.

Gud. Dude. Askye's got it, for sure. It also sounds like you've had a lot going on and maybe need a break to reset and get some perspective somewhere else for a little while?

Scola, I totally get not having it in you to do the work for a class, particularly right now. To be fair, the kind of work that a class is is very different than the kind of work therapy is, and, even if it's a little basic for you, it should at least give you a lot of good vocabulary and an instructor to ask questions and advice for. Maybe it would give you something to focus on that isn't, you know, all this.

It turned out well — Dad agreed to give us the guns and wasn’t unduly angry.

I am so relieved. I have minimal experience with people having hallucinations, but those I have known would fight you or disown you if you tried to explain reality. FWIW, I think it is good he knows it isn't real. I hope you were able to sleep well last night.

But hey, here’s a photography class that’s right in my strike zone.

I hear you on getting accustomed to hermitting. The class sounds like a perfect way to break out of the rut. You have a real talent and spending time with people who understand and appreciate that talent may be just what you need.

The birthday calendar reminds me that today we celebrate Strix! Happy birthday! I hope that the year to come is filled with laughter.

Strix!! Happy birthday.

God, you have my email and my number. Reach out to me anytime.

On a side note the noise canceling ear muffs I got are more the kind for working conditions. Bulky but lightweight. It's a good visual signal I need quiet. It doesn't cancel out voices but does a good job with canceling out M's phone . We're in the habit now of lying in bed and he'll watch anjme or tiktok and I'll play a phone game or read with them on .

It's been interesting and sometimes trying living in a house with 2 people who seek out noise and sound to fill the silence and me who needs to get away from it. It's meant compromise from all of us and it took me awhile to figure it all out and it's still a process but we are getting better at it.

So glad that it turned out well, Steph.

Some pictures from the weekend.

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