Yesterday after yoga my classmates were going on about how wonderful they were finding doing their practice at home, and could we keep this up when the pandemic was over?

I did not howl down the channel, but it was a near thing. I do not want to do yoga alone in my living room for the rest of my life! My therapist sent me to this studio as part of my social anxiety management: "Here is an hour a day out of your house where social interaction is fairly controlled."

With my people, I am very touchy. I miss inadvertently holding hands with my friend Nicole when the studio's crowded and we're doing twists on the floor, I miss walking arm-in-arm with my honorary Norwegian mom as I see her to her car, I miss Helen adjusting my stance while muttering "Your hip's playing up again, stop pushing". It hurts to be reminded of what I've given up, and hearing everyone on the call saying "Isn't it terrific?" No, it's a stopgap until we can be together again.

amyparker, I hear you. There are things that cannot be done remotely.

Sorry about the rant last night. I just hit points here I'm at the end of my tether.

ND, don’t apologize for ranting here. I’m sorry things are so difficult right now.

No apologies. It is amazing that you aren't screaming at the world and random strangers daily. This has all been too much. There is more hope than a month ago, but it surely ain't over yet.

Somehow I've made it to December, and I haven't had to let go of any of my full time employees, and they all still have healthcare, so we've been just getting through, but this has been insanity.

ND, if we need to start apologizing for ranting here... then hi, I've got a lot of apologizing to start doing.

It is amazing that you aren't screaming at the world and random strangers daily.

That.

Also, {{sj}}.

It's almost 22:00pm here and I managed to handle everything I needed to do today, and I'm trying to make my brain stop fussing about everything else that still needs to be done in general. I am not a fan of this feeling.

Edited to add:

Somehow I've made it to December, and I haven't had to let go of any of my full time employees, and they all still have healthcare, so we've been just getting through

That is an amazing list of accomplishments. I can't imagine what it has been like.

ND, that is truly amazing.

Wow, ND, that's incredible. Congratulations. Also, I barely thought that was a rant!

ND, what else are we for, if not to listen? You're doing a fantastic job.

Juliana, I wound up chatting with the teacher after class, and she agreed with my point that she wouldn't feel comfortable pushing us in the poses if she hadn't had the hands-on time with the core group: she's familiar with our bodies and our capabilities, and knows we have the sense to modify or leave a pose out completely if we can't do it.

(We've been working on Crow. I have fallen on my face twice. Like, 'loud crash, Jim comes running from the office, bruises for three days after' fallen. She knows I'll tap out if I can't continue; she hasn't worked enough with the remote students from other parts of the country - we're getting some, it's wild - to be sure they won't push and hurt themselves more.)