That makes sense, hummingbirds are totally into gaining height both to flee and to attack. Doesn't work so well indoors, though. Glad leaving it alone worked!

I don't think my brain is fully engaged today, but I am sputtering through the workday nonetheless. One more meeting and I can turn on my fan (I can't hear what anyone says over the fan. I guess I could wear headphones, but that would require going an getting my headphones from wherever they are so that's not going to happen.

I hope that was just a one time fluke that doesn't mean anything bad and will just be this weird thing that happened, meara.

Yeah, not being able to breathe definitely freaks you out and makes it harder to breathe.

Fly, little hummer, and avoid houses henceforward!

Laura, I can believe your DH's reaction. I have one of those, too. Try to convince him parents have to let their adult kids fuck up. It's their right as adults, even though it hurts so much to watch. Not dad's fault unless he was a bad dad and he definitely was not that. Sneak in a little hug of fellow parent angst from me--you don't have to say who it's from.

That sounds so scary, meara. I hope you and your doctor can figure it out and stop it happening again.

Try to convince him parents have to let their adult kids fuck up. It's their right as adults, even though it hurts so much to watch.

So much this! My sister was going on and on about what my son should do and I reminded her he was a grown-ass adult. She constantly goes on about what her 50-year-old son should and shouldn't do. She claims she doesn't give any advice she wouldn't give to an adult friend.

I have zero interest in telling other adults what to do. I have enough on my plate to make my own decisions. If anyone wants my advice then I am happy to oblige. Yes, I hate seeing my children make mistakes, but I made my share when I was their age and came out okay.

I have had so much of both help and "help", it's amazing that I can decide anything, really. Don't do that!

Have skipped to end.

Is anyone up and have bandwidth for being my emotional soundboard? Several of the people closest to me are reacting and judging me and I need to crowdsource my crazy. I’m angry and ruminating and all the meds have failed me in my quest for sleep to reset.

(Please don’t take it personally if you offer and I don’t take you up on it. I can’t figure out what I need right now and it keeps changing anyway. )

( Also I solemnly swear that I am not a risk to myself or others, so don’t worry if I just disappear for the night)

smonster, I just got up from a nap to escape the unseasonable heat, and I'll be up for another three-four hours at least. Profile addy is good if you'd rather chat in private, but I'm ok with chatting in-thread too if that's easier for you.

And I promise not to take it personally if you change your mind.

(Absolutely awful news this morning, I'm logging in just to say I'm OK. Several rounds of sirens in Jerusalem and in third of the country. I'll check with Nilly after Shabbat is over. I'm staying safe).

Shir, thanks for checking in. The news is terrible, and I'm glad you're okay.

Karl, thank you so much. I ended up crying myself to sleep eventually. Didn’t even see your offer until this morning.

Well, now I really don’t want to look at the news, which isn’t much different than the norm.

Thank you for checking in, Shir. Sending love and calming vibes y’all’s way.