SONOFABITCH.

I'm so angry on your behalf. You all deserve better than this bullshit biology.

May the love (and rage) of your many friends and family give you strength, and carry you forward. May there be sunsets and sunrises and lavender and dutch babies and butterflies and music and romance novels.

{{hugs to all the Zmayhems}}

Our culture is very bad at dealing with death. Or, it knows how to commodify it but it doesn't know how to weave it into the fabric of our lives.

I think about this a lot, and it's something we talked about when camping* over the weekend. The miracles of modern medicine have truly been a blessing, but with that blessing, those of us with access to it find ourselves at an unprecedented remove from it, so we've lost those threads. Kind of wish we could figure out how to put them back into place.

(* The actual context when camping was the tonal difference between true crime books written when death was more of a daily part of life and true crime books written in the modern era.)

Tim's second surgery is happening now, so please send successful surgery~ma and easy recovery~ma his way, please.

Go Tim and Tim’s surgical team!!!

Much ~ma for brilliant surgical maneuvers, and easy rapid recovery for Tim.

But I'm also relieved to not push her through this wringer any longer. It has been brutalizing.

I've been close to people who chose the worst brutalizing treatments, and those who chose to treasure whatever pleasures they could with their time with loved ones. It is an incredibly personal decision and I always respected that, but it is kinder to body and spirit to not suffer through the most aggressive treatments.

May you have a longer lifetime to treasure the everyday moments than anticipated.

I can accept death. What I have a hard time accepting is why certain people get less time on earth than certain other people. I will never understand it, and remain shaking my fists at the sky angry that some of the absolute best people get fewer days, fewer years, than some of the most atrocious.

Yeah, that's hard to get past.

some of the absolute best people get fewer days, fewer years, than some of the most atrocious.

The Kissinger dilemma.

the absolute best people get fewer days, fewer years, than some of the most atrocious.

aka, "Why is Trump still alive?"

Good job on Tim's spine! De-curve that kid.

Jacqueline woke up this morning and requested poached eggs and she ate them both and that's a good start on the day. Definitely better than yesterday's oatmeal misadventure.

We're talking with our UCSF oncologist via Zoom at noon today to talk about the plan going forward.

Jacqueline woke up this morning and requested poached eggs and she ate them both and that's a good start on the day.

That sounds delightful!

I’m waiting for the surgeon to come talk to me, b/c the surgery is over. And then I want a great big burger and a crunchy salad.