Okay, Tim's alarm is going off. Here we go.

And we are like “girl, get all the tinder booty you want after the pandemic and we will cheer you on, but we don’t want you to die from COVID because you are “desperate” to hook up!”

If there is ever a time for oninism, it's NOW. Self-love is self-care.

So Wide-Awake Tim tries to have an actual important conversation with me, every. single. fucking. time.

Oliver perches and waits for me to wake up (they tend to rise early). Since I am the only one in the house that also enjoys snuggling they need their morning hugs. But OH-EM-GEE the mental downloads I get from a 14 year old are EXHAUSTING. Especially before I'm coherent or caffeinated.

Recommend you stand outside your bedroom door screaming "FEED ME" over and over again, Steph.

Pix sometimes tries to give me important information in the morning. It usually doesn't work out well.

Lol I totally want Steph to just stand outside the door screaming “feed me! Food! Food! Food!”

My husband frequently tries to have important conversations with me after 11pm when we're getting ready to go to sleep. Dude, NO. My brain is SHUTTING DOWN NOW. No information can be gotten, no decisions can be made. Anything you remind me of now will NOT BE REMEMBERED LATER so DO NOT BOTHER.

I tend to go to bed before M, and he, without fail, will call me back in the living room to a) show me something funny or b) ask me about something we talked about a week ago. My dude. My love. I am Going. To. Bed. NOTHING is that funny. Not even Super Troopers. And my brain will not remember anything, because all mental processes are devoted to anticipating the sweet, sweet coziness of Bed. Mmmm, Bed.

Teppy, if Tim returns from his unplanned trip to the sun, there's a thing we do (when we remember to). This comment from Jessica brought it to mind:

My husband frequently tries to have important conversations with me after 11pm when we're getting ready to go to sleep. Dude, NO. My brain is SHUTTING DOWN NOW. No information can be gotten, no decisions can be made. Anything you remind me of now will NOT BE REMEMBERED LATER so DO NOT BOTHER.

We have the "10 o'clock rule," although it's a PM rule for us. (We've now known each other for 30 years and have been married for 26 of them, so we'd already learned a lot of this shit the hard way, before we were told about the 10 o'clock rule). You can invoke it to pause/postpone an argument or important conversation, if it crops up at a bad time of night (or day, in your case).

Sometime when you're not mid-launch, it might be worth it to have a talk about how there are certain time blocks (for both of you, I presume), in which you require immunity from talking about big things, and which time you may invoke the X o'clock rule with impunity.

Then, just by saying, "X o'clock rule," the other partner knows it is not the time for this serious, important conversation. There's an emergency exception, of course, like if they're bleeding from the eyes or someone died. Your Eye Blood May Vary.

Caveat: cats, dogs, and small children are rubbish at abiding by the 10 o'clock rule (at least the ones I've known).

Just... if Tim makes it back from his impromptu trip to the sun.

Oh, Tep, that is not on. Remember, it's easier to fling out of the solar system than to launch into the sun.

I always learn so much from Buffistas. Thank you, -t.

ΔV to send something from Earth into the Sun: 31.48 km/s
ΔV to send something from Earth out of the Solar system: 18.25 km/s

source: [link]

I didn't launch him anywhere, but that status may change if he forgets to feed the damn cat. He said he would feed the cat. We'll see. And I reminded him that my 2 brain cells aren't going to retain anything at 5:30 in the morning, and he said "Yeah, I keep forgetting." Like my wild bedhead, blank stare, and inability to string a sentence together doesn't clue you in? Sheesh, man.

Maybe you should get a big neon sign for the living room that flashes TEP IS ASLEEP and put it on a timer. Then he will know that even if he sees you and your eyes seem to be open, you are asleep, because sign.