Teppy, if Tim returns from his unplanned trip to the sun, there's a thing we do (when we remember to). This comment from Jessica brought it to mind:

My husband frequently tries to have important conversations with me after 11pm when we're getting ready to go to sleep. Dude, NO. My brain is SHUTTING DOWN NOW. No information can be gotten, no decisions can be made. Anything you remind me of now will NOT BE REMEMBERED LATER so DO NOT BOTHER.

We have the "10 o'clock rule," although it's a PM rule for us. (We've now known each other for 30 years and have been married for 26 of them, so we'd already learned a lot of this shit the hard way, before we were told about the 10 o'clock rule). You can invoke it to pause/postpone an argument or important conversation, if it crops up at a bad time of night (or day, in your case).

Sometime when you're not mid-launch, it might be worth it to have a talk about how there are certain time blocks (for both of you, I presume), in which you require immunity from talking about big things, and which time you may invoke the X o'clock rule with impunity.

Then, just by saying, "X o'clock rule," the other partner knows it is not the time for this serious, important conversation. There's an emergency exception, of course, like if they're bleeding from the eyes or someone died. Your Eye Blood May Vary.

Caveat: cats, dogs, and small children are rubbish at abiding by the 10 o'clock rule (at least the ones I've known).

Just... if Tim makes it back from his impromptu trip to the sun.

Oh, Tep, that is not on. Remember, it's easier to fling out of the solar system than to launch into the sun.

I always learn so much from Buffistas. Thank you, -t.

ΔV to send something from Earth into the Sun: 31.48 km/s
ΔV to send something from Earth out of the Solar system: 18.25 km/s

source: [link]

I didn't launch him anywhere, but that status may change if he forgets to feed the damn cat. He said he would feed the cat. We'll see. And I reminded him that my 2 brain cells aren't going to retain anything at 5:30 in the morning, and he said "Yeah, I keep forgetting." Like my wild bedhead, blank stare, and inability to string a sentence together doesn't clue you in? Sheesh, man.

Maybe you should get a big neon sign for the living room that flashes TEP IS ASLEEP and put it on a timer. Then he will know that even if he sees you and your eyes seem to be open, you are asleep, because sign.

But OH-EM-GEE the mental downloads I get from a 14 year old are EXHAUSTING.

Matilda has to relay every plot point from every anime she's seen, with emotional commentary and TikTok memes, including many where I don't know the characters at all.

I do keep in mind that there will come a time when I miss having easy conversations with her so I try to remain open to them (somewhat). But it's like 85% of everything she says to me.

My husband does this. He either asks me something complicated as soon as I wake up

It's not even that Mr. Loomy talks about important or complicated things after I get up! It's just that he talks to me and expects that I'll be able to take in any information before caffeine.

WFH has ramped this up, and I keep having to say "Honey? Trying to focus on reading work Slack". Or, y'know, stare blankly at him while clutching a teacup.

Matilda has to relay every plot point from every anime she's seen, with emotional commentary and TikTok memes, including many where I don't know the characters at all.

Every conversation I have with Tickybox, ever. But I'm glad she texts me randomly, because I miss the kid.

Neither TCG nor I wake up happy. If ltc wakes up on her own, she’s ready to go and to talk nonstop for the next 12 hours. If we have to wake her up for any reason, she’s absolutely miserable and will snarl and whine.

From Dylan I get a running TED Talk on video game history based on whatever YouTube video he just watched, and from Aeryn it's brick-by-brick descriptions of everything she's found or crafted in Minecraft that day. I really do miss the days when they were in school all day and could have these conversations with their peers.

Has anyone here used the Common app for submitting references?