This is the safe place to freak out right? E's last response to a test was 6:30. He is also not answering calls. I've been calling for over an hour. rings and rings and goes to voicemail. When he is annoyed he will set it to go immediately to voicemail.

I texted an adult friend not far away to go check on him. Also called his one friend (are they still friends? I have no idea) that I have a number for and he has not heard from him today and he tried calling also, no answer.

the places my brain are going are all awful.

If he's not feeling well, he may be asleep.

he's not dead. he was, in fact, asleep.

my thoughts in no particular order:

overdose
stopped breathing
covid heart attack
kidnapped by an uber
tried to walk to drug store and hit by car

Now to try to go to bed. I foresee awful anxiety/guilt dreams.

I swear I cannot figure out which is worse trying to parent 1000 miles away and having no answers or having him do nothing under my roof.

Oh yikes msbelle. What a nightmare. And he's probably JUST FINE and doesn't realize he's making you bonkers. Good luck. Hope he manages to not have COVID and keep the job. (ETA: Glad to see he was in fact asleep)

I managed to apply for a job tonight! I'm not sure I'd actually want it (it's local--would they want me in the office all the time??) but it would be a step up from my current role, and if I managed to get it and it sucked, I could probably springboard back to my current company easily. Worth a shot, but I didn't spend a toooooon of time on the resume update or the cover letter. I fulfill basically all the requirements, so hopefully they'll see that and at least get me in for an interview. It's a small place, but I linked-in stalked some of the folks and wasn't horrified (sometimes at tiny companies I read the bio of people who would be my coworkers or boss and am like "that's all your experience??? what? NO"). Fingers crossed I at least get an interview? Even if I don't tend to be great at interviews.

I swear I cannot figure out which is worse trying to parent 1000 miles away and having no answers or having him do nothing under my roof.

I think all of it. At once. I'm sorry that you are going through it.

Did he test? My experience with Covid was, amongst all the rest of the bad, being so exhausted. Scaring everyone who cared about me and couldn't reach me because I was just so tired.

I hope you can get some rest for yourself, msbelle.

{{{msbelle}}} ugh, how awful!

Good luck, meara! Go you, applying

Today is the day we celebrate the birth of Teppy! Steph, I hope this is a day you put in the very good day column. May the day and the year to come be filled with good health, love, and laughter.

Oh msbelle, I feel your parental pain so much. I hope the visit goes better than anticipated.

Go meara! I hope it works out.

Happy, Happy Steph Day!!

I am heading out soon to meet my sister halfway to get my mom's china and a wooden cradle our grandfather made for us. China for Jen. Cradle NOT for Jen. Just transporting cradle on to niece. (Niece not pregnant, but she's the most likely next up.)

Happy Birthday Teppy!

Happy birthday Steph!!

Get your shit together, mac! Stop giving your mom anxiety!!