I'm a vision of hotliness, and how weird is that? Mystical comas. You know, if you can stand the horror of a higher power hijacking your mind and body so that it can give birth to itself, I really recommend 'em.

Cordelia ,'You're Welcome'


Natter 76: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Foaminess  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


flea - Jun 17, 2019 3:25:12 pm PDT #8830 of 30019
information libertarian

At the University of Georgia sorority rush was the week before school started. But then, a lot of students arrived on campus knowing what they wanted, because of family members or older friends.

At Duke it was the start of second semester.


Matt the Bruins fan - Jun 17, 2019 3:46:34 pm PDT #8831 of 30019
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand

Hilariously, the one fraternity I looked into during rush turned out to be the university's Animal House equivalent. Let's just say there was a bit of a mismatch.


Jesse - Jun 17, 2019 4:32:29 pm PDT #8832 of 30019
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

We had fraternity rush in the fall, but sororities didn't do it until second semester.

You guys, I've been meaning to buy some of that double-stick tape because my cat is tearing up my furniture, but then PetCo sent me a coupon for $30 off $100, no food included, so now I'm getting All The Cat Stuff delivered to my house. Because I couldn't bring myself to buy an enormous tower, I'm getting several other ridiculous items.


-t - Jun 17, 2019 4:47:35 pm PDT #8833 of 30019
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration

Yay cat stuff!

It took me a minute to remember what "rush" means in that context. Entirely outside my experience


Allyson - Jun 17, 2019 5:50:28 pm PDT #8834 of 30019
Wait, is this real-world child support, where the money goes to buy food for the kids, or MRA fantasyland child support where the women just buy Ferraris and cocaine? -Jessica

Really starting to panic about the prospect of becoming a parent. There's so much to do, and figure out. Just, I worry all the time.


sj - Jun 17, 2019 5:53:24 pm PDT #8835 of 30019
"There are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea."

Worrying all the time is great preparation for being a parent. Seriously though, Allyson, you're going to be a wonderful mom.


-t - Jun 17, 2019 6:06:09 pm PDT #8836 of 30019
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration

That sounds normal, Allyson. You're gonna be great


sarameg - Jun 17, 2019 6:20:16 pm PDT #8837 of 30019

You'll figure it out. And what you think you can't, you'll wing it & that will be fine. Sometimes hard & terrifying & worrying, but she'll be loved & safe & you will see to that.


DavidS - Jun 17, 2019 6:31:09 pm PDT #8838 of 30019
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Really starting to panic about the prospect of becoming a parent. There's so much to do, and figure out. Just, I worry all the time.

They're pretty resilient if you don't leave them in the car during a heatwave.

Once you get the hang of the basics it's more of a grind than a non-stop siege of panic.

You are smart, and you are caring and you are competent and you will master the basics in no time.

I will reiterate what I consider to be the Three Essentials of Parenting.

1. You have to keep them alive. More generally tend to their well being, keep them fed, and get them to the doctor when they need it.

2. You need to love them and let them know they are loved. You do this from the very beginning and it gets into their skin and they know they are worthy.

3. You have to set boundaries. This is the unintuitive one. The thing you have to learn as a parent, and every kid requires a different style. But you have to keep them on the rails. They need to be socialized. They crave structure. They need to know you are constant.

And that's it. Do that and in most cases they will grow to become themselves.

I'm not saying it's easy. It's not. But you are well capable of doing all three of those things.

Just let people help, because you're going to get very tired and frazzled at times. Sometimes it's really boring too. They need a lot of repetition.


DavidS - Jun 17, 2019 6:36:41 pm PDT #8839 of 30019
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Really starting to panic about the prospect of becoming a parent. There's so much to do, and figure out. Just, I worry all the time.

I'll also note that when EM was pregnant with Emmett, I started having nightmares - almost one a week - where he was already born and under the covers and smothering.

I'd wake up in a panic kicking off the sheets trying to get the baby out. But there was no baby yet! Just the advancing stress of being alert! On top of it! Can't Sleep The Baby Needs Me! Before Emmett had even arrived.

The weight of that responsibility was heavy on me at first. It takes a while to trust they will sleep through the night without you watching them breathe. And later that a stranger can take care of them at a daycare without you.