Buffy? I like that. That girl's so hot, she's buffy.

Forrest ,'Conversations with Dead People'


Natter 76: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Foaminess  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


Laura - Oct 26, 2020 12:25:48 pm PDT #28137 of 30019
Our wings are not tired.

Thank you, all. I just have been seething all day.

eta: Part of what annoys is that he is like me in that he has this ridiculous list of things that have pissed him off over some crazy number of years and was spitting them all out. I used to do that with DH#1. He told me that if I just told him daily when he did something that annoyed me it would be more effective than saving it up for once every five years. He was right and I corrected my behavior. I am not where I am discussing anything with son though. His grievances are absurd and as the parent here I have no need or desire to justify anything I have done.


Topic!Cindy - Oct 26, 2020 12:42:07 pm PDT #28138 of 30019
What is even happening?

Laura, I'm sorry. You do not deserve that, and I'm glad you're looking out for yourself. It's also really unhealthy to litigate past grievances. Good for you for not buying into it.

He was bitching that I didn't keep the dishes up when they were here, which made them uncomfortable!

After my brother-in-law and sister-in-law split, my nephew, who was an adult (and graduate of a college for which his parents had paid) moved his adult GF into his father's house. They both lived there rent-free.

GF wasn't working. The guys were. She'd only do her dishes and my nephew's, not my b-i-l's dishes. She'd cook dinner for herself and my nephew (with the food my b-i-l bought, in his kitchen, with his pots and pans, and eat off his plates), but not for my b-i-l. They moved out when they got married and were angry that my b-i-l wouldn't pay off the GF/wife's student loans.


Toddson - Oct 26, 2020 12:53:20 pm PDT #28139 of 30019
Friends don't let friends read "Atlas Shrugged"

Laura, I'm tempted to say something about having a big baby living with you ... but it's hard to find the words.


Laura - Oct 26, 2020 1:11:30 pm PDT #28140 of 30019
Our wings are not tired.

Pretty much the same kind of thing, Cindy. Also, we generally ate earlier than the kids so our dishes may have been there when he went to cook. I have a dishwasher. He could have rinsed them and put them in there. I have no guilt over not immediately washing my dishes after I ate so that my son living rent free with his wife didn't have to feel uncomfortable. Ungrateful ass.


Kate P. - Oct 26, 2020 1:20:05 pm PDT #28141 of 30019
That's the pain / That cuts a straight line down through the heart / We call it love

Yikes, Laura, that's some poor decision-making on his part! I'm sorry. Hope he comes around and manages a decent apology.


aurelia - Oct 26, 2020 1:29:45 pm PDT #28142 of 30019
All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story. Tell me a story.

Laura, I'm sorry you're dealing with that. From where I'm sitting it sounds like he needs to learn to deal with his stresses without taking them out on the people around him, especially before he has to start parenting.


Jesse - Oct 26, 2020 1:45:09 pm PDT #28143 of 30019
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

His grievances are absurd and as the parent here I have no need or desire to justify anything I have done.

I am glad you have the right attitude here!


Topic!Cindy - Oct 26, 2020 2:17:35 pm PDT #28144 of 30019
What is even happening?

Pretty much the same kind of thing, Cindy. Also, we generally ate earlier than the kids so our dishes may have been there when he went to cook. I have a dishwasher. He could have rinsed them and put them in there. I have no guilt over not immediately washing my dishes after I ate so that my son living rent free with his wife didn't have to feel uncomfortable. Ungrateful ass.

Nor should you have any guilt. You and your husband weren't their kidnappers. You were their benefactors.

The uncomfortable makes me chuckle at him (not in a mean way; my husband and I are still sponsoring two young adults ourselves). It says a lot about his life has been, that your speed at getting the dishes done even rates among your parental sins.

I did not have perfect parents. I have not been a perfect parent. And SPOILERS: * I did not produce perfect children. *

Dear Laura's Impending Grandchild:

Please be healthy and strong, but maybe get your days and nights mixed up for a little while. Do it for your grandmother, who is itching to spoil you rotten. Also, when you're older, please sigh loudly, and "forget" a lot, when your parents ask you to do a small household chore.

Love,
Your Buffista Fairy Godparents


sj - Oct 26, 2020 2:35:53 pm PDT #28145 of 30019
"There are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea."

What Cindy said. Also, maybe pee on them a few times, Impending Grandchild.


Topic!Cindy - Oct 26, 2020 2:49:56 pm PDT #28146 of 30019
What is even happening?

Excellent addition, sj.