Sophia, I was there at one point. I'm glad you're getting help and have a plan. Try not to beat yourself up to much. You can't change the past.

Sophia, I echo that it was really brave for you to post and good for you for doing so. Making a plan and being in therapy sounds like you are on the right path. Hiring professionals is excellent.

I also hope that you can share this with Maria at some point.

If there is anything we all can do virtually, please let us know.

Sophia I know it must have been really hard to tell us this. I'm glad you did.

I am not a hoarder but I struggle with keeping things clean. I realized a few years ago I can't live by myself because the house work, and work, and everything else is too much.

Give yourself permission to throw things away if it gets too much to deal with deciding to donate or trash. You'll have professionals so that will help. I've been trying to clean up and had piles of dirty dishes /storage containers and I just started throwing things away. Environmentally unfriendly but it is what I could do.

Thank you for sharing that with us, Sophia. You do know that we love you no matter how much junk you've got.

Please don't hurt yourself or run away. Remember to breathe. It is hard to believe right now, but you will get through this crisis and still have a home for you and your kitty. It will work out.

You've already set things in motion and you've been working with your therapist.

Imagine living in a safe, lovely, spare space with your kitty. You can get there.

I do think you'd do well to have a roommate. It's definitely something to consider going forward.

The good news is - it's surprisingly easy to throw things away once you get going. You've got a dumpster coming. Fill it up. Let that stuff go. You will be surprised at how freeing it is.

We love you. We're don't care about your housekeeping or lack thereof, except that it's stressing you out now. Keep talking to us and updating us.

That's hard, Sophia, but you're taking steps to improve things. And I'm sure you'll be able to make a safe home for you and your cat.

All my love, Sophia!

Thank you for sharing with us, Sophia. And it takes so much courage to admit this and move forward with a plan to fix it. Anything any of us can do to help you, we're here.

{{{Sophia}}} I'm so proud of you for posting all that, and honored that you trust us with it.

Sophia, all the love and strength in the world to you. You can get through this.

On the very pragmatic front, it may give you some peace of mind to talk to a lawyer that specialized in tenant rights. They may be able to help you put tighter an agreement with your landlord given the fact that you are in therapy and having professional help come in for the cleaning.

Sophia, all the strength and housing~ma and love to you. I cannot imagine how hard it is, but you are brave and capable of this and taking big steps in the right direction.