sj, that sounds like a GREAT day!

Thanks. This helps a lot, since Emmett is quite obviously an amazing human.

Yeah, it's actually a small concern on the obverse side with Matilda who is much more eager to please. And...that can be an issue later in life where you sacrifice your own needs to make others happy.

Basically you need a little bit of Fuck-It in your nature. If you come by it naturally you have to socialize it and keep it on the rails. That's what we did with Emmett.

Matilda needs to grow a little more Fuck-It, so I have to nurture it.

Though I did see an encouraging sign of it at her orientation at the new Middle School. I picked her up at lunch time and we were hanging out afterward at the playground. And she had met three other girls who all knew each other from their elementary school (and while they were in the same grade they were a little bigger and older). And they knew her but weren't quite including her in their games but she just shoved herself right into their social mix until they were playing with her.

Then the alpha girl asked Matilda to hold her phone while alpha got on some apparatus and swung around upside down. And another girl (bigger than Matilda) tried to grab the phone and Matilda completely stiff-armed her and held her off and was totally "No Fucking Way, Bigger GIrl."

I think the soccer helped her learn the value of pushing and shoving against bigger girls.

That was actually something her coach noted in our last party. How much he loved watching Matilda go toe-to-toe with the biggest girls, and best players on the other team. He said she was fearless and she never gave an inch, even to girls who were a head taller.

No butter knife under the cast!

TOO LATE HAHAHA I DO WHAT I WANT

So I invented something: taped the vacuum cleaner's crevice tool to the hair dryer. Got some cool air under the plaster which helped, especially on my trapped foot.

ooo, clever. I like that.

Zen, I saw an article that someone's designing a cast that's made of waterproof something (plastic? fiberglass?) that's cut like netting so it's not only more comfortable but you can shower in it, your skin doesn't get as itchy, etc. Wish you'd been able to get something like that.

That's pretty cool. Maybe that will be available if/when I break something else. *knock wood*

Wanker once again failed to answer the door this morning, so I gave the delivery man his number. Delivery guy didn't call back, so I guess his phone DOES work. @@

What a jerk he is. Hope you can get rid of him.

We went to meet ltc's new teacher today who was teaching camp. ltc walked right in and started playing with the other kids like she had been doing this all her life. And she even helped at clean up time!

She's a great kid.

Matilda needs to grow a little more Fuck-It, so I have to nurture it.

Everybody needs some Fuck-It. But it must be comforting to know that if anyone ever messes with his sister, Emmett will take them apart and put them back together wrong.

That was actually something her coach noted in our last party. How much he loved watching Matilda go toe-to-toe with the biggest girls, and best players on the other team. He said she was fearless and she never gave an inch, even to girls who were a head taller.

Good for you, Matilda!

hahaha I do what I want

Think that shows enough Fuck-It

Matilda needs to grow a little more Fuck-It, so I have to nurture it.

One of my favorite Matilda stories you've related was when the music said, "Take good care of yourself, you belong to me," and she responded, "You belong to no one!" Seems like the girl's got a good head on her shoulders, and a sturdy spine to support it.

Yeah, I think soccer was good for me in that way, too. I played defense, mostly, but I could stare down a boy twice my weight bearing down on me. They blinked first, in the end, mostly.

But I still spent a lifetime kowtowing to other peoples' needs, so it's good to nurture it with Matilda now. There was a very distinct moment in recent therapy wherein I was all, wait, not giving a fuck is an option here? And then suddenly it was, everywhere.

I feel hopeful that more girls are growing up that way now. Not feeling like they're responsible for everyone being pleased all the time.

There was a very distinct moment in recent therapy wherein I was all, wait, not giving a fuck is an option here? And then suddenly it was, everywhere.

Heh. My therapist said to me a couple of weeks ago, "I feel like you're REALLY CLOSE to that stage of your life where you have zero fucks left to give about all the bullshit going on, and that is going to be glorious."

(I am not there yet.)

I'm still pretty amused at the parallel paths our therapy took, Tep, considering our divergent issues.

I am feeling pretty bereft at the loss of my therapist, too, amidst everything else.

But yes, it was a beautiful and liberating moment. Lights shone down from heaven. Pretty sure there was a choir.

Not that it's stuck, entirely, but I can definitively say I give fewer fucks at the moment than previously were given.

Think that shows enough Fuck-It

The Fuck-It is strong in this one

May we all soon achieve a helpful level of Fuck-It