askye, I feel for you, that's what holiday shopping always is for me too! It's ridiculous. Frantically trying to find things they'll like, no one ever takes my suggestion to make a f*cking wishlist, and I end up doing a Sunday-before-Christmas run to Marshall's and TJMaxx. It always works out fine but who needs that stress? This year I'm giving everyone gift cards.

My sister's long-time live-in boyfriend (they refuse to get married) has been ill for a month. He had a gangrenous gallbladder taken out (I know a couple people here have dealt with bad gallbladders) but kept getting fevers and pain, so they put him on a scary powerful antibiotic. The fever is gone, thank TPTB, but he feels awful, can barely eat, just sits in his comfy chair, and he's lost a bunch of weight. He was 240 and he's down to 186. He has a CAT scan scheduled for Friday. Apparently he's a grumpy patient. My sister is doing her best but she's stressed tf out with worry and having to be a caretaker, and her job kind of imploding. She said she was actually glad we weren't doing holidays this year, because she couldn't handle that stress too.

Man, I hope we all can get vaccinated by spring. I'm a hermit by nature, but not wanting to go out is way different from not being able to go out.

edit to add, Cindy, I feel for your DH; I'd have wanted to sink through the floor.

Y'all, I am rewatching Season 7 (why that season? Dunno) and I had totally forgotten how much gratuitous shirtless Spike we get. The thirst is real, and seeing a nice bit of iliac crest peeking out from under the covers is just delightful.

Buddhists holiday zoom in 20 minutes, I’d anyone needs a reminder!

^ is an excellent auto-correct

I think my family has hit the COVID wall of FUCK THIS SHIT.

My oldest is struggling hard with virtual learning and has taken to just ignoring assignments and not turning stuff in. His teacher is a hard ass (has been all year), which would likely be fine if we weren't in COVID hell, but is really hard to take right now. There is no grace from her regarding the fact that this super extroverted kid is missing his friends, is not getting enough physical activity, and struggles in school in the best of times. She gets my wife all worked up and I have to talk her down from "punishment" because NOPE, I'm not coming down hard on him right now. His life is upside down. In normal times, he'd lose gaming and/or work toward some reward but these are far from normal times. Gaming is literally his lifeline right now - it's socialization with friends, it's something he enjoys, a rarity these days. He is super sensitive and cries often. He's starting puberty. It's a fucking lot. I am so angry that we have 45 during this time and things have been handled so poorly.

We pulled my youngest to homeschool (he was not able to do virtual in any way - he's super anxious and he's 7, so...). He was supposed to start at a tiny homeschool pod this month but with the COVID numbers the way they are, we are holding off and it worries me for him. I know having to repeat a grade isn't the end of the world (that's the "worst" thing that can happen here), but I know it would do a number on his psyche.

I'm struggling to get anything done in my new job. No stress is being put on me at all, but I am an over-achiever and it's weighing on me. DW is in charge of all weekday childcare and it's a LOT. We are at our breaking point as a family and we have months to go. I know we are not alone in this, and that in many (most) ways we are so super privileged. That doesn't make it not hard, though, you know? No real point here - just needed to get it out, I guess.

In normal times, he'd lose gaming and/or work toward some reward but these are far from normal times. Gaming is literally his lifeline right now - it's socialization with friends, it's something he enjoys, a rarity these days. He is super sensitive and cries often. He's starting puberty.

I feel this - how can I take away screentime when screens are the only way they can see their friends?

{{{{{Glam}}}}} I'm so sorry. ltc was having so much trouble being home, and I'm afraid we'll be back there again soon. I'm thinking of keeping her home an extra week after Christmas break regardless. She misses her grandparents, and I fear she is showing signs of anxiety/depression. I was super generous with screen time when she was home. TCG wasn't happy about it, but he wasn't the one home with her.

Tea:

Instead of taking away screentime for bad behavior, I have taken away specific shows for the day that I know she prefers to watch, but I'll still let her watch something else. It has mostly been effective.

I feel this - how can I take away screentime when screens are the only way they can see their friends?

Yeah, every time DW mentions this, I am aggressively like, "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" He is not allowed to have his Switch in his room during the school day (temptation), but otherwise? It's all he has.- and it's not enough! He would absolutely spiral if we did that. Nope, nope, nope

My oldest is struggling hard with virtual learning and has taken to just ignoring assignments and not turning stuff in. His teacher is a hard ass (has been all year), which would likely be fine if we weren't in COVID hell, but is really hard to take right now. There is no grace from her regarding the fact that this super extroverted kid is missing his friends, is not getting enough physical activity, and struggles in school in the best of times. She gets my wife all worked up and I have to talk her down from "punishment" because NOPE, I'm not coming down hard on him right now. His life is upside down. In normal times, he'd lose gaming and/or work toward some reward but these are far from normal times. Gaming is literally his lifeline right now - it's socialization with friends, it's something he enjoys, a rarity these days. He is super sensitive and cries often. He's starting puberty. It's a fucking lot. I am so angry that we have 45 during this time and things have been handled so poorly.

That's so hard! There just aren't any easy solutions either. Matilda's been handling the schoolwork okay (and the school and teachers have been very helpful) but the lack of socializing has really taken a toll on her. She's struggled with depression this year. And she's gone from soccer/softball/aerial/track girl to a complete early teen blob. Which, admittedly, she's been going through a growth spurt and there's a lot of sleeping involved.

One thing that helped a lot was the jewelry class she took with her friend Iris through Parks and Rec. They had to walk over to GG Park twice a week and back, so even just getting them out of the house was good. But it was a small group, properly distanced and masked - but it was with other human beings and she made some new friends. Plus creative activity, which she isn't getting from school.

I've decided Emmett's xmas present is just going to be a Get Through The Covid Winter Kit.