He doesn't go to AA meetings. He really doesn't like them. He does have an excellent therapist, who he's been seeing since his relapse in 2016.

And he's in touch with the therapist. It sounds like he's doing everything to correct course. Telling you (who wouldn't know unless/until things blew up) and his wife, from whom he could conceivably hide it if he got totally off everything by the weekend, is really promising. It sounds like he wants to get and stay sober in a very real way.

Try to breathe. You're doing what you can do. It's hard to be an accountability partner, but your brother even welcomed that. Love to you.

Ugh that sounds so hard, Teppy. Def sounds like he's doing better than the last time, and hopefully his therapist can dig into what made him relapse now, but yikes. Good luck to you, and to him.

First call update: he and the friend who came over were getting ready to take the dog for a walk, so he'll call me back in half an hour or so. A walk sounds good. When I was out there in 2016, he literally couldn't leave the house, even to take the dog out to pee, for 2 days.

So he really does seem to be in a better place this time. But it's still freaking my shit out hard. I'm having a really hard time concentrating on work.

I'm going to throw a load of towels in the laundry and make lunch. I think I need to accept that my concentration is going to be shitty today.

Aw, Tep, I'm sorry. That's a lot. But I agree with what Cindy said, and it sounds like your brother is doing all the right things right now, which is promising.

Happy birthday, Hil!

Tep, hey, of course you're freaked. The last time this happened, it was bad, and you're afraid for him. Give yourself permission to say "Welp, this is not gonna be a good detail day" and put what focus you've got on broader-stroke things like the laundry and dishes.

Hil, happy birthday!

Latest phone call update: he has 2 friends there, and still sounds pretty decent. MUCH better than he was on day 1 of his beer taper in 2016. I'll give him another call in 2 hours and see how he's doing.

Sorry, Tep. Get it together, Tep's brother. (Is Rational Recovery still a group?) Hi, Shir, from another member of the t-shirt caucus. I'm not sure what self-care is a lot of the time, cause my work life and my life bleed together so much, but for today I'm gonna decide it's not arguing about labor unions with somebody who posted that an auto job in MS is a "golden goose"

(Is Rational Recovery still a group?)

I think it is, and I feel like he did check them out as an alternative to AA, but didn't stick with them, either.

Some people are not joiners...I get it, but I hope he has enough support. what do I know? Got pulled in with Golden Goose dude anyway.(Still don't know why this guy follows me. Of course, in a rom-com, we'd kiss each other silly while fighting over card-check or whatever, but I don't think that ever really happens.)

Oh, Teppy, I've been there. Sounds like he's doing exactly what he should, but being far away and having this just kind of come out of the blue must be a real gut punch for you. Sending lots of strength vibes your way.