Zen, as a parent, that has certainly been my experience.

Slept well last night. I'm not staying the day with my shoulders in my ears, but I can definitely feel the anxiety bubbling under the surface. I took my new meds but my doc said that the Buspar well take a couple days before i feel a difference there.

I'm going to keep making lists. I used to keep a bullet journal but that went by the wayside a couple months ago (should have been a red flag). I pulled it out yesterday and I'm approaching how I update it a little differently. I think it is going to be more narrative/diary style with lists so I can track my progress out of this hole.

Completely separately, CJ's girlfriend just flew home from college last night and will be spending the day here with CJ. Crowley and I are going to spend the day, and night, at Kelly's. Which reminds me, I need to pack some PJ's and clean clothes.

^^^ Everything David said about parenting!

One thing that surprised me about Belks is their restroom/changing room policy

That is very encouraging.

I'm trying to make a decision on returning to FL. Reasons to leave this weekend: Although we would be in separate cars I would still travel with DH so joint rest stops and hotels and company along the way in case of car issues or whatever. I would be able to arrange seeing SIL in NYC and Fran in Richmond along the way. It is getting pretty cold up here and I don't have effective heating. Reasons to wait another week: The 1 year anniversary of my mother's passing is next week and I worry about my step-dad's grief level. It would be easier for me to go through the orderly process of packing and closing up the place for winter by myself unrushed.

I don't know yet, but I have to make a decision today or tomorrow.

Thanks, Hec and everyone else. ltc was horrible the rest of the day yesterday, even for her grandparents. She was also pulling at her ear and babbling in her sleep last night. So, I think yesterday was a particularly bad teething day. I do feel bad when other kids are clinging to their mothers in the morning, and mine doesn't even notice if I leave, and never wants to leave with me at the end of the day.

How horrifying, Steph. I hope that maybe the police got a clue about the abuse going on there. I'm really worried about those children.

I do feel bad when other kids are clinging to their mothers in the morning, and mine doesn't even notice if I leave, and never wants to leave with me at the end of the day.

And you would feel horrible like you were torturing her if she did cling! Parenting is full of these emotions. Super fun is when they totally love the other parent and have no use for you. Ah, memories! (at least they ended up going back to being Mama's boys later in life)

How horrifying, Steph. I hope that maybe the police got a clue about the abuse going on there. I'm really worried about those children.

I am, too. She is a goddamn horror show.

Steph, that is awful.

sj, if she's anything like my kids, she'll go through several phases of clinging to you and then not caring if you leave, then being clingy again. Rose was in daycare from 4 months onward, yet when she was 3 (and had just transitioned to a new room at school, right around the time that Jane was born) she went through a horrible phase of screaming and crying if we left her at daycare, even though she later came to adore that teacher more than any other she's had before or since. Laura is totally right that you'd feel bad if she was clinging and you had to leave her in that state, too!

She's growing up in a safe and loving home and family, and I trust that you feel she is safe and loved at her daycare too. That's the important thing.

TW: infanticide (I white-fonted)

So, there was a horrible, horrible murder of an 18-month-old baby in New Orleans by her father because he said God told him to do it.

link

I actually used to work with him. So I'm a little shocked and shook.

Teppy, can you make an anonymous complaint to CPS? This doesn't sound like a safe environment for children.

Suzi, glad you were able to get in with your doc. I hope the changes make a difference soon.

sj, you're a good mom. LTC is a toddler with strong feelings and opinions, which will probably change on a minute by minute basis. She's loved and healthy and safe. Please be kind to yourself.

That's horrible, Nora.