Yes, Liese. Hi!

God yes. I get this even in my friendships, which was somewhat baffling to me until I worked out it was probably a gender oriented societal expectations issue. I'm easy to talk to, so dudes often unburden themselves to me. We'll have a pretty deep exchange, maybe over some time, and then they will friend ghost me. I'll think I pissed them off somehow. And then, months later, they'll pop up again, either totally surface, or all deep and intense again. Lather, rinse, repeat. I finally worked out that I pull this shit out of them and then they get freaked out at having been vulnerable with me and panic and bail.

I haven't worked out what to *do* about it, yet, though! Other than recognize that those friendships are flaky at the moment, and not to rely on them too hard.

I'm sorry I missed your productivity round! I could have used it tonight, seeing as how it's 10:30 here and I'm just now buckling down to work. Um.

Well, I'll need to do another one tomorrow night - want to plan on it? We can do it here if others are interested or via text/fb messenger/skype/whatevs.

I finally worked out that I pull this shit out of them and then they get freaked out at having been vulnerable with me and panic and bail.

Yeah, I think there's some of this. What an exciting exercise it is in realizing it's not about me (check), having empathy for what they're going through (check), and setting boundaries (work in progress). I won't chase after him. Been down that stupid road too many times. I've already checked him once for flaking on me (felt a little bad about that, he had fallen back asleep). I think I have maybe a week left in me of this little emoji dance, but not much more.

As for what to do about it... in theory I could date women, in practice it's been a loooong time since I met a woman I was even interested in. Here they seem to be all polyamorous artsy types (not for me) or conservative country lesbians (*really* not for me).

eta Oh right, productivity. Sent work message, got insurance quote, and I think that's it for tonight.

Suzi, I hope you got some help and I'm sorry CJ let you down.

Message sent to doc, emoji sent to boy, and I'm headed to bed.

It has been a weekend of me doing too much. I already explained Saturday. Today I wanted to go to the farmer's market and had planned on Kelly picking me up so I could take my meds. Well, instead we met there, so I tried just going with my crutch and no meds. That didn't last. I had a meeting to attend from 2-6, so Kelly dropped me off there and took my car home. One of my Con team-mates took me home after dinner. Now I'm home, drugged, feeling zoned but not sleepy. Arg. I'm already planning on working a short day tomorrow anyway, so I'm not going to stress it too much. I can move more than I could on Thursday, but it gets achy pretty quick.

So, I'm trying to enjoy the fact that my futon is as comfortable as I remember it being in the store. I boughts sheets and pillows for it, so I have a functional guest space should anyone ever wanna come hang at Chez Suzi.

I'm also getting involved in the volunteering side of a very small Con that is in a couple of weeks. This is a baby Con compared to DCC. Mostly fan run panels, some guest artists, fairies, and blanket forts. My lead volunteer person was my assistant director at DCC, so it is incestuous Con family time. After today's meeting, the three of us from DCC went out to dinner, played Munchkin, and talked about both Cons.

Yeah, boundaries. I'm not too good with those, either.

I'm totally down for a productivity round tomorrow! I got a little done tonight, but not enough. It's going to be an interesting day, so I'll play it by ear, but I'll pop in here when I can.

Good job, productive people.

Well fuck me and my drugged out last week. I let my work password expire on Friday and now I can't get through to our IT group as they are having "higher than usual call volume". I can read and send e-mails but that is about all I can touch right now. Ugh. Happy Monday.

ltc had a reaction to fresh tomatoes this weekend. So now I can't give her any tomatoes for a month. How am I supposed to cook without tomatoes for a month? Especially since pasta is the one thing I can reliably get her to eat.