Laura, that is tough

My uncle has been moved home and is apparently regretting his decision to forgive further treatment and is in a lot of pain. Pain is not what palliative care is about, and I feel like I could advocate as nursing adjacent but my aunt is not really accepting help. He was also told he was not eligible for out of home hospice care because he weighs over 200 pounds, whicj seems like NS to me.

Yeah, I can't quite believe that.

I'm sorry he's in pain, at any rate.

That would be BS, not NS. I am going to talk to a palliative care nurse I know at work to see if she has any insight. I get they might need assistive lifting for him, but instead they send him home with my tiny aunt?

Yay for safe kitty! My sister's dog went "missing" a couple days ago. We were taking a lunch break on her porch and decided we hadn't noticed Kelsey in a while so we called and called, and nothing. This is the mountains and she wanders some, so we weren't very concerned. I take a bag of stuff to my car and sister notices the dog's nose peaking out from under the porch stairs watching me. Still not a sound out of her in response to our calls. She had gone under the stairs and dug herself a nice comfy hole, but in doing so she piled the dirt up blocking her exit route. We dug her out. Pets!

Yikes, Sophia. That doesn't seem right at all. I hope he gets quality help soon.

Sophia, that sounds like total BS. I mean 200 pounds for a man of a certain height isn't an extreme weight. I hope your aunt gets and accepts some help.

Pain is not what palliative care is about

Wait, what the SHIT??? That's not true at all. Patients in palliative care no longer receive treatment for their specific illness (cancer patients no longer receive chemotherapy or radiation, for instance), but the whole point of palliative care is to focus on quality of life and ensuring that the patient is comfortable, which includes pain management. Literally, there are published guidelines about how to assess and manage pain in patients receiving palliative care.

If your uncle isn't receiving pain management, which might mean opioids, he needs a different health care provider NOW. And also, the weight limit thing for hospice care is bullshit and might also mean he needs a different health care provider ASAP.

Please let me know if I can research anything for you. He shouldn't have to be in pain right now. That is cruel and unconscionable.

Lots of housing~ma for you, quester.

Sophia, that sounds wrong. I hope you can help get it straightened out.

I'm taking half a day off today to get a haircut and clean my house before some friends arrive tomorrow. Gonna be a busy weekend...

Wait, what the SHIT??? That's not true at all. Patients in palliative care no longer receive treatment for their specific illness (cancer patients no longer receive chemotherapy or radiation, for instance), but the whole point of palliative care is to focus on quality of life and ensuring that the patient is comfortable, which includes pain management. Literally, there are published guidelines about how to assess and manage pain in patients receiving palliative care.

That was kind of my reaction too! I worked on an ENd of Life nusrsing certification program. Part of my problem is I am getting information from my aunt to my mom to me, so a) I am not sure my mom is translating right and b) I am not sure what the drs/nurses are actually saying to my aunt/uncle. My aunt has said several times that thye are of the generation that the doctors just told you one to do, and they keep being offered choices. SO maybe the hospice in their rural community doesn't have a Hoyer, but there could be an option of hospice elsewhere, but they said no or didn't understand.

ETA- and my mom keeps telling me it is nosy/bossy/rude to contact my aunt directly.