Okay, now I'm sniffly.
And now I'm dreading the next time I watch
Lilo & Stitch --
like that movie didn't have enough crypoints already, I'll now not be able to see Noni strong and exultant on her board without remembering that that is ita's crypoint.
ita's family has arrived safely, and the phones are working. I think I forgot to send LAistas the phone #s, will do on my lunch break.
I haven't cried since last week, the night we found her. I'm in denial, mostly, which is ridiculous considering the circumstances. I watched the coroner take her away.
When not in denial, I am alternately furious and numb.
Allyson, you have the prettiest hair.
Your hair is lovely, Allyson. Also, you have great lips. (Is it weird to say that?)
Please let them know that if there's ever anything they need, anywhere, there will be a Buffista at their beck and call.
I don't know if this is at all helpful to say, Allyson, but denial, fury, and numbness are utterly natural reactions.
Your hair is so pretty, Allyson.
Yeah, I tend to dwell in the denial and numbness for the longest.
All of those emotions are totally reasonable, plus any others you might feel.
Denial, fury, and numbness and going through the motions got me through one of my best friends' unexpected death at 39. Sometimes, even after all these years, they still crop up.
Denial can get you through some really bad times.
Msbelle told me the bad news last week, and I read through the Natter thread and the first 100 posts of this, and I said I was going to come back and post, and I just let denial work for me, too. Weirdly, ita is the second person I knew through online fandom to die suddenly and way too young in the last six months, and it's a lot. But I wanted to come by and add my sorrow to the pile here as well. I haven't been around for a while, but I worked closely with ita to design and build this place, and she was a presence to be reckoned with. She'll be missed.
Allyson, you have dealt with a lot, and with grace, and whatever strength I can send you and the rest of the LA crew telepathically, consider it sent.