Spike's Bitches 48: I Say, We Go Out There, and Kick a Little Demon Ass.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Your wedding day was about you guys, Tep. The point was to celebrate the way you wanted to, and you did. No guilt.
Also? Some people are always going to find something to bitch about. Like they say, you can't control what other people think, but you can control the way you respond. Which is, like, brenda said, not to in this case, I think.
Oh yes. Fist-shaking at the jackassery commencing!
Some people are always going to find something to bitch about.
Seriously. If we had been able to invite the woman who made the shitty comment (and she really WAS on the list of "if there's room, we want her there"), then someone ELSE would have been hurt.
In fact, we haven't really seen many people yet since the wedding, and I'm anticipating uncomfortable interactions when we do, along the line of "Oh, Betty and Barney were there? Gee, I wish WE could have been there, too!"
And 99% of these people are married. They planned weddings! They know you can't have 300 people just to make sure no one's delicate baby feelings are hurt! Because IT'S NOT THIRD GRADE.
Ugh, Teppy. How ridiculous. My BFF is getting married around Christmas, and there's been this whole drama with a friend and it's made me roll my eyes forever. Have I sometimes been sad if I wasn't invited to a wedding? Heck yes. But have I accepted that it's a thing, and lord knows I've also been to weddings where I have hardly seen the bride and groom since? Yes. It's one day, shit happens, you go on.
BFF and I both used to be friends with this girl K. She was a fairly good friend of both of ours. But she's a terrible correspondent, and has gotten really wrapped up in work the past few years. So I haven't talked to her in forever. I still think of her fondly, but we really aren't friends anymore. Meanwhile, BFF still lives in the same city as her, but also hardly sees her, or talks to her. The only reason BFF does sometimes see her is that K has been off and on dating another good friend, M. M is the other "best man" at the wedding. BFF thought about it, and was like "Look, I'm not going to invite K. She's not really a good friend anymore. But I am inviting M with a plus one, and if he wants that to be K, no problem". But apparently K is finding this to be horribly insulting and upsetting, and M was like "you should call her and tell her and talk to her" and my response was "Seriously?? The only thing worse than not being invited to someone's wedding is being CALLED UP AND TOLD YOU AREN'T INVITED"
Oh, teh dramz.
People are so weird about that stuff. That's why we decided to elope, because we are so unable to deal with that pettiness, and we're kind of babies about it.
They know you can't have 300 people just to make sure no one's delicate baby feelings are hurt! Because IT'S NOT THIRD GRADE.
And yet! It's so absurd.
Rant to us and continue to ignore her. Grownups, and I assume she is one, should know better. And yet!
Stupid typos.
People are so weird about that stuff. That's why we decided to elope, because we are so unable to deal with that pettiness, and we're kind of babies about it.
I'm glad we did it the way we did it, and I thought grown-ass adults would understand that (1) our wedding is not actually ABOUT THEM, and (2) weddings actually have monetary -- and SANITY -- restrictions on them 99% of the time, and therefore 99% of weddings probably can't accomodate the entire fucking world.
Man, I don't even want to deal with this person, and I know I have to see her next weekend. Or, wait, maybe the next weekend. Anyway, soon. And now I just want to punch her in the throat.
I get being disappointed about not being invited to something other people were invited to. But making shitty passive-aggressive comments about it online where you know it'll be seen by the person who didn't invite you? That's just childish.
Some people are always going to find something to bitch about.
There are also the people that you invite because you should who react by suggesting it is a gift request. You can't please all the people all the time, so your best shot is going for pleasing yourself.
I'm angry now that I'm letting this bother me. I'm angry that I'm letting this make me feel shitty about my wedding. I was doing great at letting go of my raaaage at the B&B for screwing us over, and just remembering the good parts, and now this person is using my wedding to make me feel bad for leaving her out of the 3rd-grade slumber party? And it's working.
I'm angry at myself for being so easily manipulated. And angry that a grown-ass adult would be all, "Let me take your one wedding day and use it to make you feel like a terrible person."
Wow, that is dumb and passive aggressive. What everyone else said - I've been sad about not being invited to a wedding but I dealt and got over it.