When I get depressed I not only hate cooking but the stupid dishes give me anxiety. I don't have a dishwasher so the dishes pile up and in my old place there was only 1 sink and it wasn't very deep and the whole set up kind of sucked.

So I'd eat out. A lot. And feel guilty. And trying to get it under control I decided to cut out the dishes, I switched to paper and plastic (bad for the enviornment, good for my mental health) and ate a lot of quick frozen things. Like this brand of meatballs I found I liked, I'd heat them up and heat up a steamer pouch of veggies or pasta/rice and veggies and eat that.

I did find I was able to bake boneless skinless chicken breasts in the oven without it feeling overwhelming. I did a bunch at once and then kept them in the fridge and ate them with frozen veggies and whatnot.

Maybe you can think about what feels the most overwhelming and cut down to the basics.

Yeah cooking in advance and freezing is a huge help for me. I make one dish meals and freeze mulitple 2 person servings. Over the course of a weekend I will freeze twelve 2 person servings in total of three different dishes. Crockpot meals divided and frozen. Not suggesting that for everyone. I know people who that would drive crazy. But I cook two weeknends in a row,s skip the third and don't cook at all on weekdays.

Awww, Tep.

I'd just invest in Trader Joe's meals that you can pop in the microwave and DON'T GIVE HIM A CHOICE.

(Don't give yourself a choice either. Just stack up five things that you know he'll eat and grab the one on top.)

Like he walks into the house, you go grab a frozen lasagna, pop it into the microwave and just hand it to him.

And when you're a little less stressed and your ADs are all calibrated you can get back to dealing with dinner.

Hec is wise. Some of the other stuff probably is too much to deal with while dealing with depression.

I normally love cooking dinner for everyone, but lately I am Steph with regards to dinner, or I would be if I didn't have to feed kids. But I am doing a lot of making fish sticks or pasta or bean burritos for the kids and then not eating because it doesn't look appetizing to me. I do eat breakfast and lunch, but I'm all decisioned out by dinner time.

I still live alone, so am apt to go for the "hmm, cheese and an apple? And then some pita chips? Ooh, and ice cream to round it off, that's totes healthy balanced meal right?"

I follow Hec's meal plan most of the time. Stock up the freezer with frozen meals I like, grab one, no decisioning necessary.

I've considered making a wheel o dinner, maybe with darts. Spin the wheel, and it tells you what's for dinner. Burrito? Pasta? Beans and Rice? Quesadilla? Quinoa pilaf? Soup? Kettle Corn? Brownies?

Unless you don't like that choice or don't have the ingredients, then you spin again. Right now i'm stuck on the sofa and incapable of complex preparation. Last night was quesadilla with fake cheese, black beans, and guac. Tonight may just be a repeat since the guac won't last.

IoMeN, apparently after the ambien and vicodin cocktail fails to cut it for sleep, the next step in the progression of "please for the love of everything holy just knock me out and let me sleep and i'd prefer to not have a concussion in the morning but i'm looking at that rubber mallet with sincere interest right now...." is valium. Huh, that hadn't even occured to me. So that's waiting in a pill bottle. And in 'faint glimmer of hope" the lady-PT found a series of nasty trigger points in my abdomen which are linked to a 'pseudo visceral pain' phemonenon. I've never in my life been so happy to hear the word "pseudo." Yes, i'd very much like to hope that this is not intractable visceral pain but some pseudo visceral pain that can be beaten back with some painful triggger point work. I'm fully signed up for that plan of action. *Fingers crossed*

Ugh. I have a thing I need to put somewhere...and then I'll follow up with a good thing.

If you are bored to tears by the dog bite saga, feel free to skippity-do-da.

So, I've felt pretty fortunate that I have not run into the former friend after sending my final email to her some weeks ago. I saw her at a distance once and was able to change course. It felt pretty good that I spent no time ruminating. I just said, "Plot Twist" and carried on.

This morning, I was in the front yard with Cagney and his new girlfriend. (Her name is Earlene Sue and her daddies put a double strand of pearls on her at the weekend. She's gorgeous and we see her twice a day.)

I have a very early client on the first Thursday of each month, so it was at time when I am not normally out.

I glance across the street to see the top of former friend's head, clearly walking her dogs. I just turned around and leaned on the fence, not wanting to catch her eye.

Suddenly, the former friend and her older dog, who is a special favorite of mine, are in my peripheral vision. They have CROSSED to my driveway and are meandering down my side of the block...for no other reason than the dog is in a full cast up to her hip on her right rear leg.

This action was deliberate. The ff knows how much I love that dog...I even mentioned it specifically in my final email...so she crossed so that I could see the cast and then dawdled so I would be sure to see the limp and whatever.

Now, my heart is aching for Pony and I'm furious with this manipulative woman all over again.

If I don't reach out over what is clearly a serious accident/injury, I'm a heartless bitch. If I do I'm certain ff will use it as an excuse for why she hasn't followed through on her promise to help with my medical bill...or whatever.

I could just scream.

If I don't reach out over what is clearly a serious accident/injury, I'm a heartless bitch.

No, you are NOT. Fuck her. Her disregard for your injury pretty much proved who the heartless bitch is, and, again, it's NOT you.

You can have sympathy for her dog, but fuck her. Fuck reaching out to her. Hell no. She's continuing to manipulate you, and you deserve to give it zero attention. Take care of YOU.