If Trump wants a truly impenetrable wall of racism between us and Mexico, he should build it out of my cervix, because NOTHING is getting through it.

Maybe he'd offer me a position in his cabinet if I Tweet that to him.

Which I will NOT do.

I have to say, between waking up on Jan. 1 with no water, getting food poisoning (which technically started in 2016 but lasted through yesterday), and now the Impenetrable Cervix Misadventure, I am not impressed with 2017. And we're only 4 days in.

Step it UP, 2017.

To my credit, I've never actually thrown up on a medical person ....

It is a minor miracle that I have not.

Oh Steph, I am so sorry it was so awful. I know it really worked well for you. Is there no other options for pain free insertion? DH#1 was snipped, as was my brother, and they both said it was no big deal, although we did tease them about the whole icebag in the crotch recovery thing.

I only tried an IUD once. It was very painful, and continued being painful for 3 days, after which the thing expelled itself. No, I did not try again.

Is there no other options for pain free insertion?

My OB/GYN said she can do it under anesthesia in an OR, but that's a much bigger deal and she usually only does that when she's already doing another surgical procedure. And I don't think I want to go under anesthesia for an IUD, not if Tim is willing to get snipped.

Didn't we order a nice 2017 for Teppy?

Tep, can you wait until the return of the red menace allows for softening? Though I will say that some aspects of my body are happier without an IUD and my periods haven't gone back to full-on horror show since.

Tep, can you wait until the return of the red menace allows for softening?

I wondered about that.

Though I will say that some aspects of my body are happier without an IUD

But I also wondered about that. Since Tim is willing to get snipped, I think I'm going to go IUD-free and deal with periods again, whenever they return.

Good lord, Steph, that sounds horrendous. Glad Tim is willing to get snipped.

Coincidentally, I was supposed to get IUD #1 today, but I've missed my last couple of periods (might be from messing up my pills) so my doc wants me to get bloodwork done first. Which I was supposed to do this morning, but overslept AGAIN and had to reschedule for tomorrow. At least it meant I was 10 min early to work.

I am slowly, slowly learning to shut my big fat mouth at work and just nod.

Roommate has declined to talk in person because he's "emotionally exhausted from the excessive texting and rescheduling" (actual quote) and now basically says "I can't make you respect my needs." So I'm going to use my own good judgment and do what the fuck I want, just like he does, and I may or may not give him a heads up first. Please note he was the one who wanted to talk in person in the first place.

I really don't want to send the next ten months in icy politeness, but I guess we'll just see what happens.

Icy politeness beats rudeness of any temperature, IMHO.

But I also wondered about that. Since Tim is willing to get snipped, I think I'm going to go IUD-free and deal with periods again, whenever they return.

Get some Thinx! They're awesome!