It must be early or Tim would have already had symptoms of lung issues.

Other than the collapsed lung last year (see below), yeah, he really hasn't had any other symptoms. I asked him tonight if walking the 5K or the 1-mile was strenuous (to be clear, in the 5K, we did a 20-minute mile, and the 1-mile was about a 16:40 mile because it was cold AF out there, so we certainly weren't hauling ass and suuuuuper exerting ourselves), and he said not really -- it just felt like exerting himself at more than a lazy amble.

His primary-care doctor is the one who wanted to send him for the pulmonary function tests, I guess because Tim had reported pain on the right side of his chest, AND his primary-care doctor knows about the RA diagnosis and last year's collapsed lung, so he wanted to be proactive. (I thought that the results would be normal but would provide a good baseline for future comparisons down the road. Damn it.)

Did the doctor say whether or not the freaky lung collapse a while back was related?

There's no way to know 100%, but it's entirely possible. Collapsed lung is a known complication of RA, and it only happened a year ago (he's been having symptoms of RA for close to 3 years, so since the RA probably started first, the collapsed lung could be related).

So, Tim came home and I told him that the doctor called and said the test results indicate rheumatoid lung disease, and I googled and flipped out. He was...taken aback, but not upset like I am. Or even worried. Frustrated, mostly. Plus, he said that the technician who did the tests told him his results were good (though, I think, she didn't say that after *every* test.)

Then he checked the website that has all his medical stuff and his primary care doctor sent a message with a garble of test results (they weren't formatted into a table, so I cannot make sense out of them) and then at the end said "Tests show slightly reduced lung capacity that could indicate rheumatic lung disease."

"Slightly" and "could" are EXCELLENT words here. Of course, they aren't actually a diagnosis or a guarantee. Tim says that he thinks his primary-care doctor is being proactive as hell, (as opposed to diagnosing horrible fatal lung fibrosis) which is something his doctor does -- acts proactively, that is -- which is a very good thing, no question.

Tim had a chest x-ray within the last 4-5 months, and his rheumatologist saw the results and they didn't raise any concern for him. So I'm hoping this is...I don't know. "Best" case is that he just has baseline reduced lung function for a man his age, for no reason other than that's just what his lung function is.

I'm trying SUPER hard to not think about the worst case at this point.

I took an Ativan before Tim got home, so I'm more chill but still low-key worried AF. And he had to go back to work to wrap some stuff up (which is okay, because I need to finish some stuff up, too).

I love you guys. Thanks for being here. Please keep your fingers crossed that he just has lazy slacker lungs and no actual disease process. I need to keep him around.

t edit I keep typing "collapsed LUNCH" instead of "lung". That would be a horrible thing.

I put my hands on my hips and will slip my fingers inside the waistband of my pants or skirt. Which I know looks weird, but the feeling of the band against my fingers feels.. anchoring or something. And if I'm sitting down at home sometimes I'll do something similar to what Ed Bundy did in Married with Children (I don't put my hand down my pants just so I feel the waistband around my first set of knuckles) but that I have to hide.

I wish you could see me chuckling at this, because I *totally* do this. ALL THE TIME. One night early on in my relationship with Tim, I was already in bed under the covers, and I was idly snapping the waistband of my underpants. But since I was under the covers, he was all, "Hey, watcha doing down there?" t eyebrow waggle And I looked blankly at him and lifted up the covers to show him I was snapping my waistband. All he could do was laugh. But he's very tolerant of my non-neurotypical brain (probably ASD, but it's hard to find anyone who evaluates adults and if you do find someone it's expensive as hell and not often covered by insurance [which we are already draining this year], so although I've talked with my brilliant primary-care doctor about it [A LOT] and done a shit-ton of research, there's really no point in an official diagnosis, and I don't really talk about it much because I don't want the "Oh god you are Rain Main" reaction and/or the "You think you're a special snowflake" reaction, because neither is true). (Not that I think anyone here would react that way, because alla y'all aren't dicks. But just as a blanket policy I don't talk about it much. Though it does make my ENTIRE life make sense for the first time.)

So I'm super emotional right now and full of Ativan and apparently just brain-dumping. TL;DR: Have I mentioned? I'm probably on the spectrum. (That's probably doesn't surprise ANY of you in the least.)

My uncle had lung complications with his RA, but he was much older than Tim and not nearly as fit. Once his lungs started to collapse they were in such bad shape they had trouble keeping them reinflated.I think the fact that it hasn't happened again and Tim isn't feeling overly stressed when exercising are good signs. Best possible outcome for Tim.

Tim says that he thinks his primary-care doctor is being proactive as hell

Proactive is a very good thing. You, Tim, and your PCP are all on top of this.

You, Tim, and your PCP are all on top of this.

My part in the equation is to run around shrieking like Daffy Duck when he lost his shit.

Steph I feel super lucky that my therapist (who I picked for his trauma experience) also has experience with ASD and was pretty much like "so has anyone ever talked to you about this" and gave me a take home assessment.

I actually asked him last week about more extensive testing and he said in his experience that the extensive testing gives the same results and he's had patients he knows are ont he spectrum but have something else like PTSD and they end up getting diagnosed with other stuff EXCEPT Autism/aspergers.

He assured me this counts for insurance purposes and to be "official".

Also I saw the FB thread with you (Steph) and Plei and I wanted to say some thigns but I wasn't sure what would show up on my feed and I just ...don't want to deal with..say...Mom reading something and feeling judged by her.

And I'm glad I'm not the only one who does something like that!

Also I saw the FB thread with you (Steph) and Plei and I wanted to say some thigns but I wasn't sure what would show up on my feed and I just ...don't want to deal with..say...Mom reading something and feeling judged by her.

My brother (also on the spectrum) and I decided to not mention it to our parents, because mom will wail about how she caused it and dad will just talk over us to tell us about some ailment he has. So we just text each other amusing stories. (When I got to Colorado when he was trying to stop drinking, and it was 11:30 at night and he was in bed because he was sick, I was sitting on the edge of the bed and he reached over to take my hand and I flinched, and he laughed and said "Oh my god, you are autistic as HELL!" and I said, "Yeah? Well, you're autistic and an alcoholic, so right now I WIN.") (We are SUPER healthy and a couple of dicks.)

My part in the equation is to run around shrieking like Daffy Duck when he lost his shit.

Not true. You look things up and you care, that is not nothing.

So I was like "I'll look at rings on Etsy" and the firs tthing that pops out at me is Stucky engagement rings. With lovey words engraved on them so that won't work.

askye, what about one of these?

Or this fidget ring?