In funnier news, I was just watching ltc on the baby monitor sitting up and playing in her crib when suddenly she must have decided she really was tired, leaned forward and fell asleep with her legs still underneath her. It did not look comfortable, but it was funny.

sj you aren't a bad parent. Kids chew books. I'm pretty sure that's the big reason board books were made. Okay they may say it's so the pages don't get torn but kids chew on stuff.

(not that I'm an expert on kids, mostly I've had cats chew on things. Penny keeps gnawing on the corner of my phone).

Zen, I wish I had some advice so you could kill the prison-bear, skin it, and wear it's pelt while doing a victory - fuck prison-bear I'm free dance. But I don't have anything.

I kind of like the idea of Prince's death causing a backward time..thingy.

Saw my therapist last week and he was all "you are doing better" and I promptly felt worse. Well it's not so much that just coming to some realizations. I haven't changed but my perception of myself has changed and it's kind of daunting. I had this thing in my head but when I go to write it down it doesn't sound right. I like the bear-prison image.

People with chronic health problems should have a Person Who Deals With Doctors and Insurance Crap. Like a therapy dog crossed with a personal assistant because it a full time job just dealing with all the emotions, or lack of emotions, or the prison-bear smothering you AND the life things that are expected AND the doctor/insurance shit.

I have this fantasy that maybe as country we should agree to not make health care paperwork/appointments/etc such a daunting mountain of crap so that the sick and their caregivers can just focus on the patient's health. Yeah, as if!

It's a full-time job to be seriously sick.

That would be wonderful Burrell.

I ... really like the image of skinning the prison-bear and wearing its pelt while doing a berserker victory dance. I also like that my mixed metaphor is now alive, because now I can visualize it and wrestle it. The Black Dog metaphor never worked for me 'cause I like dogs! I can't yell at a dog

My metaphor has been The Old Woman Who Hates Me, sitting stern and upright in a chair, in a long black dress with a very thin white linen edge to her cuffs and high collar, hair pulled back tight in a bun. Glaring and glaring and glaring. Silent and disapproving. She terrified me until I got the nerve to glare back at her.

Scary, Connie. Reminds me of my grandmother. Not in looks, but in demeanor. Much easier to wrestle a bear than her...

Maybe you can turn your bear into an ally. I was afraid of the monster I heard behind the door, until I realized he liked me. Of course, having a monster in the basement of your soul that would be happy to come out and play is also something to be afraid of. I wish I could send him to deal with your bear.

Haircut and color tomorrow! I'm going to skip the rockabilly platinum streaks because I'm too lazy for upkeep, but definitely sunny blonde instead of this winter-dark yeti mop.

I'm mostly doing it now because I have to go to Chicago next week for work, and I thought perhaps I should look spiffy.