My mom always says you can"t want for them. He has to want more for himself. And he will. Exhausted and finally shutting down for the night. If you hear loud rumbling noises from the southeast it is me snoring.

Lots of love and strength headed you way Laura, rest well

I'm sorry. I have seen a lot of people pull it together eventually.

My brother eventually ended up hospitalized for alcohol-induced psychosis. He thought the CIA was trying to break in and kill his kids. And this was AFTER his wife had taken the kids and left him and after a family intervention which resulted in him walking out of rehab.

On his own time, he quit. Been over 15 years now and he is happily remarried, he's mended his relationships with his kids and he is a great success and a great person.

I appreciate the stories of people finding their way. I know quite a number of people that have done the same. He is smart and personable and has every possible future available to him. It is only my belief that he will decide to change his path that makes these bad days survivable.

Just wish he would hurry it up a bit!

I hope your son chooses a better path soon, Laura.

Today I took E from school to swim practice. Got him a snack and everything. Only I hadn't eaten much and my anxiety was high and there was no word on if my bro or his GF would be home to feed E and I was freaking slighty over being at their house and figuring that out so Mom took him and I found food. Not out our place because it meant cooking.

I have my first EMDR thingy at therapy tomorrow and it has me on edge a bit because I want it to work but I don't want to deal with the emotions.

I also went to get Zoe's Tale from the library and they didn't have it! all the other books in the series but not that one so I went to request it (for purchase) and the guy got huffy with me. "I'm not sure they'll agree to buy it". It's the middle of a series! Even as an E book that would be good (they ahve some series that are half E books half physical books). The person who helped me when I requested Updraft was much nicer and more positive.

After serious deliberation, I have stopped taking my antidepressant. It's been two days and I feel great, and I'm no longer getting the scary symptoms. If I should start talking like I'm real depressed, or suddenly drop out of sight, would someone kindly message me and suggest perhaps I ought reconsider?

I will definitely keep an eye out for any drastic changes, Zen - not that my judgment is all that great (your post reminded me that I haven't taken my own AD, which I most definitely can't stop taking, in at least a day or maybe two or three, I can't remember which).

Zen, I hope it's not one that needs to be tapered off? Do be careful.

I've been wondering if I need to do something, too. I thought I was doing well, though my AD hasn't necessarily worked GREAT for me ever...but I've also been feeling pretty blah lately, and maybe I need that Vitamin D more than I realized? ...it's so hard for me to tell, sometimes, where the line is between "I'm lazy" and "I'm depressed"...