I don't know I just feel a part. I can't stop crying I feel more overwhelmed than anything. I want.. I want someone to tell me what I need to do and I know no one can and it has to be me. But it is so exhausting to constantly be in this situation all the time.
I keep crying off and on and I feel so alone and disconnected and doing the transitional thing is supposed to help but I don't know. There are so many choices.
Work, work part time, move , not move but if I move then I feel the weight of winter baring down and I don't want to live with Mom again no matter how much I love her.
But at what point do I just say - this isn't working, the loneliness and disconnectness I feel is outweighing any benefit of staying.
Oooh, askye, I think you are definitely feeling too overwhelmed right now to make those kinds of decisions. You need a kind of sensory deprivation tank for a few days. Try to quiet things down and keep things simple.
Yeah, WS, I would hope I wouldn't reject a solid person for being a bad speller or something, or need them to be as far to the left as me, but there needs to be some commonality, especially since I can't be some stranger's athletic kitchen-table bang.
It's embarrassing to be this old and have only been out with like, two-and-a-half people, lifetime(And the most serious one is officially ancient history)
But I want it to feel right, not just get my stats up. But there is ableism in my head that tells me "Someone like me" can't afford deal-breakers.
Drive-by to say I just uploaded the paperwork to the insurance company for my mom's home care. Fingers crossed and prayers sent that it gets processed quickly and correctly so it can be one less thing that I'm stressing out about!
I'm sorry it's so hard right now, askye.
And erika, we all have deal breakers, so good for you!
ltc will not settle down for anything today and Mom is here but I miss TCG and wish he wasn't at work.
I don't know if I need sensory deprevation more as a No Decision time period. And then someone to cuddle iwth... like a giant teddy bear come to life, only not super depressed like the one in Supernatural.
I ate something but I think tomorrow I'm getting some chocolate milk and having fish sticks (already in my freezer) and mac and cheese (in the fridge) and chocolate milk. If I can't be a kid at least I can eat like one.
It's called Comfort Food for a reason, askye. Do what you need to do to take care of you.
I'm sorry you feel so alone, askye. I wish that there were an easy fix for that feeling, but I'm afraid that the Platitude Police would have a serious case against me if I say much of what is popping into my head right now.
Yeah, erika, you get deal breakers.
