Oh Steph, we are here for you when you need us, and honestly it's not whining. You are gong through some massive changes right now, and the hardest ones aren't of your own choosing, which makes them harder.

Is there anything we can do to help with the panic?

I've been thinking about that, and I'm not sure. It's different from depression in that I can't talk myself through it; when I try to talk myself through it, it's like throwing gas on a fire. Like so:

Anxiety Brain: You're never going to get a job you have no skills no talents no motivation you're going to be living in a cardboard box in 2 weeks and not even a nice box.

Me: I won't be living in a cardboard box; Tim owns this house.

Anxiety Brain: You'll be aloooooone in your shitty cardboard box because Tim will leave you because you're an unemployable deatbeat with no skills and a horrible personality.

Me: Tim won't leave me. That...that would be horrible. Oh god, what would I do if he left me? He wouldn't leave me. ...Unless he died. Oh my god, he could die tomorrow. He could fall in the shower right now* and die holy shit holy shit HOLY SHIT I NEED TO GET HIM OUT OF THE SHOWER RIGHT NOW WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS HAPPENING?

*(He is, in fact, in the shower right now. But still alive.)

So, as you can see, I'm not too successful at talking down the Anxiety Brain. I'm not sure if asking people to help talk me through it would help, either.

I wish I *did* know what I need, what could help.

I too suck at talking down my anxiety brain, but I can say without a doubt that your anxiety brain is lying to you. I know it is hard to believe that when the anxiety brain is so loud and persistent, but I am happy to repeat it as often as you need to hear it.

I wish I *did* know what I need, what could help.

It may not be socially acceptable, but an hour at the pistol range is stellar for dealing with brain hamsters that are stuck on the wheel.

Steph, I'm going to need my brain back when you're done borrowing it.

Steph, have you considered a short term prescription for anxiety meds? This is a super fucking stressful time for you, it might be worth discussing with your doctor. And please, please, vent here as much as you like.

What I don't understand is why he included his entire sigblock in one of his comments.

He responds via email, somehow. The snarky answer would be, because he's a fucking idiot? Please, N, defend Zimmerman on my page. Watch what happens.

Steph, I'm going to need my brain back when you're done borrowing it.

And I'm gonna need bitches' brains to be nicer to them, starting right now.

I am sorry things are so rough right now, Steph, and that your brain doesn't make it easier. And no, you're not whining.

And also, since I think you announced it while I way Away With My Mono, No Joy - I was so happy to read that you and Tim are about to be married, and I never got to tell you that. That's wonderful, and congratulations.

Steph, I hope you are able to find a way to channel the panic. I'd happily take some. I am often criticized for not having the anxiety gene, but it just means I bury it and that isn't so healthy either.

Still not engaging on Facebook. And thankful to Victor for the shiny new tag.

Steph, have you considered a short term prescription for anxiety meds? This is a super fucking stressful time for you, it might be worth discussing with your doctor.

My doctor did prescribe Ativan for me, but said if I need it for longer than a month, she'd rather put me on an antidepressant that manages anxiety. I'm not interested in going back on an antidepressant, but she might not budge on that and refuse to refill the Ativan.

I find now-and-then Ativan to be a very helpful thing. Can you just take it with incidents and not on a regular schedule?