When H was in isolation for his burns, there were a couple of extremely persistent coworkers, one of whom was rubbernecking *past* me, where I stood physically blocking the door and pointing to the "isolation" sign. I wanted to pound her.

And when I was in for surgery, one of the things I remember most vividly from that 24 hours of sick post-op morphine haze was him refusing to admit the interim pastor from my mom's church and a couple of deacons who wanted to come in and pray over me. I was far from presentable, and even if I had been, you know, bathed, and lucid, those were not the people I wanted around me when I was hurting and incapable of civility. I loved him for being a watchdragon at the door.

Exactly, Beverly. Who wants casual acquaintances, coworkers, or even friends to see you with crazy person hair, while incoherent, and not smelling too good?

Especially not co-workers.

I consider hospital visits appropriate only for immediate family and maybe super close friends...unless the person has been there long enough to start asking for visitors to relieve the monotony. My upbringing was that one sends cards, flowers, gifts, reading material...but does not show up in person until convalescing has moved home (and that only after calling first to make sure that one's presence will be welcome and that the person to be visited is awake and not floating in a narcotic haze.)

I think I learned what Erin did. I've sent plants and stuff, though.

Exactly. The only time I've ever visited a non-close friend in a hospital was when her husband told me she was going out of her gourd with boredom and would welcome as many visitors as wished to come. I came bearing balloons and paperbacks. (I knew her reading tastes and that she liked balloons.) But that is an exception to a rule that applies 99.99% of the time.

ICU isn't a visiting thing. If there is one chair in there, you are lucky, and that would be for spouse/offspring type of person.

I agree with the others. Hospital visits. Not unless the patient wants it. you are wearing a thin, ugly, wrap around piece of cloth, that isn't known for hiding things wonderfully. Ya stink. Ya got tubes coming in/out of your body. Call. Text. Email. Send a card. Flowers, if they want. All those things, when they get transferred to a room. ICU? Prayers. Best wishes. Food for the family members. Baby sitting? Just stay out of the way of the nurses and doctors.

So Teppy, I'd say consensus of opinion is that your acquaintance is full of crap and should be ignored, always.

Ignored is probably best.

Though a "If the person is in ICU, I'm pretty sure they prefer visits to be family only, though it's hard to check for that. They definitely prefer the number of visitors is low." could certainly be warranted.

And if you send flowers, send the unscented kind. The hyacinths were beautiful, but they made me throw up. Balloons are actually best. Maybe get an artist to make you funky animal shapes doing questionable things?