It is back to Houston, or the Houston-area. One of the many suburbs.

Are you happy to go back?

Poor Homer is getting bad at cleaning himself, so I just gave him a going-over with a damp cloth. That's a good idea, right?

Consuela has anyone really laid into your Mom?

Cuz Msbelle's about ready to.

I am sorry to go from a blue state to a red state, but that's about the only bad thing I can think of. Maybe being farther from friends in Seattle and Portland, but we'll be pretty close to the Houston airport, and it will be so much easier to get places. SO MUCH EASIER.

I'm a little worried now that I'm going to jinx it by being glad.

Yay Mr. Dana! And Houston is a place you know and have connections, right? That'll be nice.

If she does not remember moving into the new place, what is her current complaint?

Oh, she may not remember moving, but by golly she knows where she is right now! Also, not remembering means that clearly she was whisked away without her participation or consent, which makes it worse.

Consuela has anyone really laid into your Mom?

I have. It makes no difference. She is incapable of being wrong. In fact she said as much last night. I pointed out that only God was never wrong, and she said, no, she was never wrong. Everyone around her must be wrong, but she herself is not. She will never lose an argument, she will not apologize, and in fact she's convinced that we're railroading her now because she's been "too nice" until now, and we're taking advantage of her good nature.

It's really quite remarkable, I have to say. The staff is amazed at how quickly she can switch from company manners to complete virago.

Then, YAY Dana!

I know it doesn't actually help, Consuela, but it's not your mom -- it's the disease. She's not rational, and can't be talked into anything, I'm sure. All of you just have to figure out how to deal with it in the way that makes you the least crazy.

Yeah, there is just no way to "win" an argument with her at this point. I hope she gets past the point of calling and yelling at you all the time, though.

Yeah, there is just no way to "win" an argument with her at this point.

Oh, I know that. The problem is that her dementia is not sufficiently advanced to allow you to avoid the argument. She's like a bulldog: she will not let you back out or change the subject or anything, she just keeps returning to the question of why is she here? And when you answer her, kindly and truthfully, she rejects the truth, because the only answer she believes is that we are institutionalizing her so she can be abandoned.

When my grandmother got to the point where she was convinced The people on her TV were watching her and that the government was stealing her money and we had to STOP THEM, and that was all she wanted to talk about, we all got used to just agreeing. There was no way to change her mind because there was a big part of her that loved the drama since it made her the center of the universe, a position she enjoyed. We all would let her rant and kind of nod and just not listen, honestly. She would call my mom 15 or 20 times a day at her bookstore, but not my dad (her son) because he was "at work." She finally dementia-ed to the next level, which was somewhat calmer.

Have you tried agreeing with your mother? Or does that just trigger a whole new scale of bad?